


Day Dream

by Kleptomaniac_Can_Opener



Category: Hikaru no Go
Genre: Feels, M/M, Past Lives, Puberty, freaking out
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2005-08-18
Updated: 2017-11-24
Packaged: 2018-02-08 23:13:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 20,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1959750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kleptomaniac_Can_Opener/pseuds/Kleptomaniac_Can_Opener
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Life is very dull for Hikaru Shindou, until he closes his eyes and dreams.  But how can it only be a dream when it brings knowledge he can’t possibly have?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Seeing as I’m not Hotta Yumi, I’ll have to say I don’t own any official HikaGo stuff.  
> 

It’s orange. Not a big surprise for an orange really. It’s round, has those little bumps on it, and a minor bruise towards the bottom. It’s firm, but ripe enough to eat.  
All in all, it’s an orange.  
He rolls it back and forth on the smooth surface of the kitchen table. It rolls one way, then with a light push, rolls back the other way.  
It’s a round, bumpy, somewhat bruised orange.

“I must be really bored if I’m examining a piece of fruit.” He puts the orange back in a wooden bowl with a couple of pears and a red apple. “Maybe I’ll go play soccer at the park?” he mutters to himself, but the downside to going rises up as soon as the thought crosses his mind. “But there’s never anyone good to play with. And if I go out Akari may catch me and bug me about studying again.”

Shindou Hikaru is a typical twelve-year-old boy. He’s in his sixth year of elementary, makes grades that could be better, and is the main striker and Central Forward for his school’s soccer team (they’ve ranked third in the district since he joined two years ago, an improvement from eighth). He’s a little on the short side and has a boisterous personality. It’s been said that his bright blond bangs and sparkling green eyes are a perfect match for his attitude.

For some time however, around four months if not longer, those brilliant eyes have dulled. Hikaru has been a very bored young man. Life is the same thing everyday. It’s routine, and he’s sick of it. It’s gotten so bad he doesn’t even want to go to soccer practice anymore where he gets a consistent stream of praise.

“I wish something would happen.” It’s with those words that he drifts off into the land of sleep, his head cradled on his arms.

~

“...! Where are you? You lazy child, answer me now!”

He opened his eyes. Everything was blurry for a moment until his sight adjusted to the intense sunlight streaming through the branches of the Sakura tree he had fallen asleep under. “I’m coming, hahaue!” He stood and brushed stray pink petals off his dark hakama. His braids bounced on his shoulders as he ran, his geta made clacking sounds on the stone walkway.

Though the woman was his mother, he could not picture her face. Indeed, he couldn’t see it even as he peered up at her, though he had the feeling that she was beautiful and wore makeup. Multi-colored robes swished around her tiny wrist as she shook a white finger at him. “Shameful child, you were almost late! Fujiwara-sama has no time for tardiness.”  
“I’m sorry, hahaue.” He straightened his robes then entered the room he had been led to. He almost ran into a man whose face he also could not see but he somehow knew was important. The boy was prompt when he moved aside, and bowed below his waist. He did not lift back up until a soft voice beckoned him in.  
“Come in, child. You’re ...-kun, are you not? I am Fujiwara no Sai, I will be testing your Go today.”

When the boy looked up, he saw the most beautiful person that could ever exist.

~

“Hikaru? Wake up, Hikaru.”  
“Huh? Oh, mom.” Hikaru sits up and yawns. “Guess I fell asleep.”  
“If you want to nap, go to your room. I have to start on the main dish for dinner or it won’t be done before your father gets home.”  
“If he doesn’t do overtime for the billionth time and eat at a noodle stand.”  
“That’s no way to talk about your father. He works very hard for us so we can live here and have nice things.” Hikaru stands up and stretches.  
“Yeah, yeah, I get it. I’m gonna go to the park.”  
“That’s fine, but be back in time for dinner,” Mrs. Shindou calls out as her son leaves the kitchen.  
“Sure.” Hikaru slips on his shoes, grabs his soccer ball, and trots out of the house.

The dazzling sunlight makes him pause. For a moment, he thinks he can smell Sakura blossoms. But they won’t be flowering for another half a year. Hikaru shakes his head. “I must still be waking up. Man that was a weird dream.” He shivers a bit and on second thought, rushes back in to grab a light jacket before leaving again.

“Hikaru!” Fujisaki Akari is Hikaru’s neighbor and childhood friend of the same age. Long brown hair bounces between her shoulder blades as she jogs to catch up to her friend. “Hikaru, don’t tell me you’re going to go play soccer! I bet you haven’t studied for our vocabulary test yet!”  
“Aw, I’ll do it later.”  
“You need to study! You haven’t passed a single one this year!”  
“Whatever. You know studying isn’t my strong point.”

Akari follows him as he begins walking. “Your attitude has really stunk ever since the rainy season, Hikaru. You don’t care about your grades or anything!”  
“So I’m in a funk, big deal. Once something exciting happens I’ll be fine.”  
“You can’t just let everything go downhill because you’re bored! We’re going to change schools soon! We need to study for exams so we can get into a good one! Hikaru, are you listening to me?”  
He had been listening until he thought he saw something out of the corner of his eye.

“Hikaru? Hey, Hikaru? What is it?” Hikaru faces away from her, eyes searching the streets but finding nothing out of the ordinary.  
“Did you see someone wearing a really tall hat?” he asks.  
“A tall hat? Like a top hat?”  
“Nah uh, like really tall and it tapers at the top?” Akari frowns, thinking.  
“Like the tate-eboshi those court people wear in old samurai movies? But no one wears those anymore unless it’s for costume play. You must have been seeing things.”  
“Yeah, probably.” He continues on his way to the park with Akari keeping up her tirade about his lack of studying.

The park, which is more often than not teeming with the youthful energy of the neighborhood kids, is empty except for the presence of some preschoolers and a few kindergartners. “This is weird.”  
“Everyone must be trying out that new game in the arcades,” says Akari. “And the new Miyazaki film came out just yesterday too.”  
“Oh, yeah. I forgot about those.” Hikaru isn’t much into video games. He’ll play when the mood strikes him, but he prefers to spend what little money he has on other things. Movies are really only a notch higher on his to-do list since it’s easier to wait for them to come on television.  
“Since there’s no one here, let’s go back and study together, okay?”  
“Nah.” Hikaru begins to juggle his ball; knee, leg, knee, toe, toe, knee. Akari sighs.  
“Hikaru, what’s wrong?”  
“I told you, I’m just really bored.”

In any case, they only stay for half-an-hour. Akari can’t help but frown at her friend’s ongoing depression. “Tomorrow’s Sunday, Hikaru. How about we go to the amusement park or something? That would be fun!”  
“I’ll think about it, but I’m really not in the mood.”  
“Are you sure? Because once your parents see your progress report, you might get grounded again.”  
“Oh, man, I forgot about that! And mom always looks through my bag for my homework!” With that, Hikaru sprints off in hope of hiding the damning piece of paper.  
“Hikaru! Wait up!” Akari runs after him but is soon left behind, staring at his disappearing back.

Hikaru is indeed scolded almost as soon as he’s inside the door. His mother waves a wooden spoon at him while holding his grades in her other hand. “You are going to a good school! You should be doing better than this!”  
“Sorry, mom, I’m just not that good at any of that stuff.”  
“You need to try harder! If you don’t start doing better, I’ll have to request that you’re removed from the soccer team so you can concentrate on your work.”  
“Fine, whatever,” he replies as he walks upstairs. His mother calls after him.  
“You get back here, young man! We’re not finished yet!”  
“I’m going to study, mom!”

Mrs. Shindou huffs and rests both hands on her hips. “What is wrong with that boy? His grades have never been this poor and he used to love soccer.” She shakes her head and goes back to the kitchen to finish dinner. Maybe it’s a boy thing? She’ll talk it over with her husband when he gets home.

Hikaru falls onto his bed face first. He knows he really should study like Akari and his mother keep telling him to, but he can’t muster up the will to crack any of his books open. None of the subjects interest him so they feel like a huge waste of time.  
Now that he thinks about it, his ‘mood’ didn’t start until the teacher asked them to write an essay on what they wanted to be when they grow up. When confronted with the question, Hikaru found that of all the things he’s heard of and encountered during his short lifespan, there wasn’t one thing he could see himself doing twenty years from now. Things have spiraled downwards ever since.

“Hikaru! Dinner’s ready!”  
“I’m not hungry!”  
“You’re always hungry! Come down for dinner!”  
“I’m going to bed, mom! I’m just tired!” The boy finds that in truth, he really isn’t hungry and his eyelids keep drooping. He sighs and dresses in his long pajamas to get some rest. “Maybe I’m sick?” He closes his eyes and falls asleep soon after.

~

He opened his eyes and blinked a few times. He was staring at a Go board with several stones already placed on it. He looked down; between his index and middle fingers was cradled a black stone. It fell from his loose hold into a shiny bowl with flower designs, a go-ke he knows, with a clack against other black stones. “I resign.” He looked back up and met violet eyes. His breath caught in his throat.  
“Wise choice, ...-kun. Let’s discuss the game.” Fujiwara shut the fan that had been covering the bottom portion of his face, and used it to point to the various weaknesses in black’s game. If he had defended the upper-right corner instead of the left, if he had moved a certain stone one point higher, if he had understood better why the man had played a hand where he did, and so many other things, he would have stood a better chance. “Do you understand now?”  
“Yes.” The boy bowed. “I’m sorry I wasted your time.”  
“You hardly wasted it. I’m rather pleased we had this session.” Lips painted purple smiled. It wasn’t mocking, but gentle and warm. “Your mother, Midori-dono, informed me you have only played for two months. To come this far so quickly speaks of great talent and potential. I would be glad to take you as my student.” The boy smiled brighter than he ever had before. He bowed until his head almost touched the surface of the Go board.  
“Thank you, Fujiwara-sensei! I promise to study very hard!”  
“I’m sure you will, ...-kun. I will speak to your mother about arrangements. From now on you will live here with me.”  
“Yes!”

~

When Hikaru wakes in the morning, he feels completely refreshed, like he has just lived through one of the best moments of his life. He’s quite chipper when he goes down for breakfast.

“You’re in a good mood, Hikaru.” Mrs. Shindou smiles. It has been a while since she has seen her son so full of life. It eases some of her worry.  
“Yup. I don’t really remember, but I think I had a good dream.” Hikaru digs into his pancakes with gusto.  
“I bet you dreamt you won the National Tournament.”  
“Pro’bly,” he agrees with a full mouth. He swallows. “My club is getting together after practice tomorrow. Is it all right I go?”  
“You’ll have to promise to study hard today.”  
“Aw, okay,” he says with a full pout that threatens to make his mother laugh. “I promise.”  
“Alright. Just give me a call if you’re going to be home late. And remember to stay with the group. I don’t want your coach calling me to say that he lost you again.”  
“Sure, mom! Hey, where’s dad?” The man often misses dinner, but he’s usually around for breakfast.  
“He had to leave for an early morning flight. There’s some sort of conference he has to be at.”  
“Oh.”

Hikaru is just finishing up when there’s a knock on the door. Moments later, Akari bounces inside. “I’m coming in,” announces the perky girl in an old ritual started in their kindergarten days.  
“Good morning, Akari-chan! Come into the kitchen!”  
“Thank you, Mrs. Shindou. Ah! Hikaru! You look much better today! Did something happen?”  
“Nah, not really,” he answers with a full mouth again.  
“Eww! Hikaru!” shouts the girl. “Don’t talk with your mouth full!” He swallows the last of his breakfast then sticks his tongue out at her.  
“You’re the one asking me questions while I’m eating!” She sticks her tongue back at him before giggling.

“Mrs. Shindou, is it alright that we go to the amusement park today?”  
“Go ahead, just remember to study afterwards.”  
“Yes, madam! Hear that Hikaru? We can play before we study!” Hikaru waves his fork around in a false cheer, but doesn’t complain.

 

Hikaru stares into the sky when they walk out of the train station. “Looks like it’s going to rain later.”  
“We still have time. The weatherman said it won’t start until around four, and it’s only eleven now!” Akari grabs his arm and start dragging him towards the amusement park. “Come on, I have to go to the girl’s room first.”  
“Alright, I’m coming.”

Akari hurries into the public restroom, leaving Hikaru to wait outside. He spots a couple of old men playing a game that he’s seen in old movies, on a weathered stone board. It’s called Go or something like that. “Go...” For some reason he feels his chest warm a little. He walks over to watch, but only a few more moves are played before the two start arguing.

“You should forfeit already! You can’t come back from that!”  
“I can if you’d shut up so I can think!”  
“You just hate losing!”  
“You’re impatient!”

Hikaru rolls his eyes and looks to the man playing black. “Why don’t you just move here?” he suggests while pointing to one of the empty stars on the expansive board. The men pause.  
“Hikaru!”  
“Coming!” Hikaru doesn’t wait to see if the old guy takes his advice or not. He’s probably wrong anyways. He doesn’t know how to play Go at all.

But the elder man does try the move and the result astounds both of them. “That was the perfect hand for this situation.”  
“No, fair! You got help from an insei!”  
“Quit complaining!”

It’s after three when Hikaru finds himself waiting for Akari again, though this time she’s in the restroom to clean ice cream off the edge of her skirt. He relaxes on a bench that’s situated under a tree and feels his eyes close. A short nap won’t hurt. Who knows how long she’ll take.

~

“Very good, ...-kun!” Fujiwara-sensei clapped his hands. “That was an excellent hand you played just now.” The boy beamed with pride. His teacher didn’t hand out praise unless there was reason. “But what will you do when I move here?” Fujiwara-sensei placed down a white stone next to his black, connecting them. The boy bit his lip and tried to think ahead. Why did the man move there?

The boy plucked a stone from his go-ke and thought. There was no such thing as a wasted move in Go, every stone had a purpose. He just had to figure out what that white one was doing. But the boy knew he was at a disadvantage. So far he could only see a dozen moves in the future whereas his sensei could see many times more than that.

Fujiwara smiled. “If you think too deeply, you will never move.”  
“Sorry, sensei,” apologized the boy, dropping his stone back into the bowl. “I think I broke my brain.” His teacher chuckled behind his fan.  
“Sometimes you should listen to your instincts more closely.” He closed his fan and used it to point to the board. “Try placing a hand here.”

The boy did as he was told, and while looking at it he found he understood the purpose of that white stone. “Oh, I see.”  
“You’re an intelligent boy, ...-kun. You should try hard, but not too hard. Understand?”  
“Yes, Fujiwara-sensei. I will keep that in mind.” He bowed low and felt his cheeks burning with pleasure.

~

“Wakey wakey, Hikaru,” giggles Akari.  
“Huh? Oh, sorry.” Hikaru rubs his eyes and stretches.  
“It’s alright, I’m tired too. We went on practically every ride!” She looks up at the gathering clouds. “We better go home now though. I don’t want to walk in the rain.”  
“Yeah, me too.”

Akari skips and sings as they make their way to the train station. “What are you so happy about?” wonders Hikaru.  
“I’m just glad that you’re back to your normal self.”  
“What’s that suppose to mean?”  
“It means,” she says with a grin, stopping right in front of him and looking into his eyes, “that you had fun today.” She turns around and runs for the station. “Come on! We can study until dinner then play a game!”  
“Hey!” Hikaru darts after her, catching up just as they reach the ticket machines. “You only beat me because you got a head start!” Akari laughs.  
“I know. You’re lucky, Hikaru! You’re so athletic already. You might become a star athlete one day!”  
“Hmm, maybe.” But the more Hikaru thinks on it, the less he wants to do it.

“Hey, Akari?” He looks to his friend sitting next to him. She’s watching one of the programs on the train TV while waiting for their stop. She looks away from the three-minute English lesson and smiles at her friend, pleased that he’s speaking to her again.  
“Yeah?”  
“Want to play Go after dinner?” She blinks, perplexed.  
“Go? You mean Igo? Why?”  
“Oh, um, never mind. It’s just a stupid idea. I don’t even know how to play.”  
“Hikaru, doesn’t your grandfather know how to play Go?” Green eyes light up.  
“Oh yeah! He does! He’s always talking about how he beat what-his-name!” Akari giggles at the memory. Hikaru’s grandpa gets really passionate when he talks about his youth.  
“We can go next weekend if you want!”  
“Yeah, okay.” Hikaru’s day, his entire week, looks a little brighter to him.

“Why the sudden interest in Go?” Hikaru shrugs.  
“No reason. I’m just curious about it, you know?” Akari laughs.  
“You’re so weird! Go is for old men, isn’t it?”  
“Dunno, maybe.” Except Hikaru doesn’t feel like it is at all. He stares at his right hand, imagining a stone between his fingers. “It might be kind of fun.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some dialogue is taken from Volume 1 of the manga.

"Fujiwara-sensei, I understand how much you love Igo, but why do you play so intensely at every game even when just playing yourself?" he asked while cleaning the Go stones. Fujiwara lifted his violet eyes from the Go board he was studying and smiled at his student.  
"I have yet to play the Divine Move, the Hand of God."  
"The Hand of God...?"

Then everything around him was torn apart at the seams. "Fujiwara-sensei!" The boy screamed for his teacher, trying to reach him, but the man faded from his view. The world became black and cold. "Sensei!"

There was a light from afar, casting a soft glow like morning light through a canopy of trees. Inside he saw his teacher standing at the river bank. Tears fell from his eyes like diamond drops into the churning waters.  
The man jumped and was swept away by the current.

"SENSEI!"

~

"HIKARU!"  
"AAH!"

Hikaru jerks awake at the sudden shouting from his history teacher, Fukusaki-san, much to the amusement of his classmates. The woman scowls down at him, her hands on her hips. "You are in the middle of a history test, young man!"  
"I'm awake! I'm awake! Harf!" He slaps a hand over his mouth. His belly is tight and rejecting what he had eaten for breakfast. There's a sick feeling climbing up his throat, making his eyes water. Hikaru bolts out of the classroom and to the water sink in the hall where he empties his stomach. "Ughh..."

"Hikaru! Are you okay?!" cries Akari, running out behind him. Fukusaki-san and several of his other friends are right behind her.  
"Are you okay, Hikaru?!" Fukusaki-san asks as well while rubbing the boy's back in an attempt to soothe him. "Maybe you should go see the school nurse."  
"I-I think I'm okay," he says even as his stomach gurgles again, making him dry heave.

Hikaru has never felt an illness like this before. It's like his body is trying to get rid of a thousand years of sadness. He can't explain what spurred such an emotion.  
For a moment he wonders if he didn't dream something that could have caused it, but what would make him react like this? Why can't he remember what he was dreaming only a minute ago?

He turns one of the faucets to rinse out his mouth and to clean off his face. He feels a little better for it, but that feeling of deep sorrow lingers in his guts. He straightens up and heads back across the hall to the classroom.  
"Are you sure you're okay, Hikaru?" his teacher asks one more time, her eyes worried.  
"Yeah, I feel fine now!" His smile is bright and calms her down, though Akari still looks on in concern for him.

Fukusaki-san puts her class back into sorts and everyone returns to answering the questions on their history tests. Hikaru sighs and wonders why he didn't just go to the nurse's office. ‘Where did Perry sail into?' he thinks to himself. His hand begins to write the kanji before he registers that he seems to know the answer.

Uraga Bay.

By the time Hikaru is released from the jail known as school, his spirits have risen back up. He's pretty sure he actually passed the test this time! He grins as he slips on his outdoor shoes. "Hey, Akari, I'm going to my grandpa's. You coming?"  
"I can't. Daddy's said he's taking us out tonight, so I have to finish my homework. Don't forget to do yours, Hikaru!"  
"Yeah, yeah, I'll remember," he mutters. "See you tomorrow!"

A train stop later finds Hikaru at his grandparents' house. "Hey, grandpa!"  
"Hikaru," the old man greets in surprise. "We didn't expect you over today. If you're here to see grandma, she's out shopping." Hikaru looks up from where he's pulling off his shoes.  
"Actually, I'm interested in playing Go. Wanna play? Winner gets a thousand yen!" The man's eyes light up like miniature suns.  
"Go?! You're learning how to play Go?!" He hurries towards another room. "Okay, you just wait here! I'll go get the board!"  
"I'm gonna use the phone, grandpa," Hikaru calls after him while dialing home. "Mom? It's me, I'm at grandpa's. Okay. Yeah, I won't stay out too long."

"So you've finally come to appreciate the finer points of Go!" Grandpa Shindo sets down the heavy wooden board. Its carved feet make a soft clack on the floor panels. "I'll play you as much as you want!"  
"One game's enough for now, grandpa. Mom said she doesn't want me out too late tonight."  
"Well, well, you're growing up and learning to be more obedient."  
"Whatever, grandpa." Hikaru flops down onto the sitting cushion his grandfather got him. "Okay! Let's start playing!"  
"Put down as many stones as you want! I warn you that I'm good!"

Hikaru pauses for a moment. ‘Put down stones? What does that mean?' he wonders. A whisper deep inside his consciousness answers him.

‘A weaker player may place down stones on the board to create a more even match.'

He wonders where he had learned that from. "I don't want to bother with that, grandpa. Let's just play."  
"But you just started learning how to play. C'mon now, Hikaru. You're just being headstrong." At his grandson's pouting expression he sighs. "Fine, you don't have to put down any stones." Hikaru then picks up one of the go-ke, the container used to hold the Go stones.  
"I like these white ones!" he proclaimed. "I'm going to be white!"  
"Hikaru! Black always goes first! Are you sure you know how to play?"  
"Fine, you go first, grandpa," he replies while taking one of the white stones from his go-ke. The elder Shindou shakes his head to himself and takes the black stone container.  
"Okay, Hikaru, here we go." With a smooth snap, his fingers place the black stone onto the board.

Hikaru's eyes focus on the stone, it rests on one of the nine black dots on the board. ‘That's called... a star point.'

~

"...-kun, solve this tsume Go problem," instructed Fujiwara-sensei. His delicate hand pointed to the board with his ever present fan. The boy stared at the stones that were set up in a classic life and death situation. "Where should black go to stay alive? Solve this in three moves."

The boy gazed at the problem for a moment longer before reaching into his go-ke. He snapped the first piece down with a resounding clack.

~

"Eh? Go?" Akari stares in disbelief at Hikaru's mother. Her friend was usually home on weekends unless he decided to play soccer in the park.  
"Yes," the woman continues, looking off to the side in thought. "He started going to a weekly Go class, and he also tried to play Go with his grandfather." From all appearances she's as confused as Akari. The boy's interest in the game seems to have sprung from nowhere. She's a little worried to be honest. Her son has always been the active sort of child who likes to move around... Go is just the opposite of that.

"Oh..." The girl looks put out on what to do. She had thought they could go to the arcade together. "I guess I'll catch him at school then."

"Oh, hey, Akari."  
"Hikaru!" The girl bounces on the balls of her feet as her friend comes in through the front gate. "Are you really taking a Go class? I didn't know you were actually serious about that old game." The boy shrugs without really answering her.  
"Why don't the both of you come inside?" suggests Mrs. Shindo. The children nod and follow her in.

"What are you doing here?" Hikaru asks while he kicks off his shoes.  
"I came to see if you were still feeling sick or not. I know you went to your grandpa's yesterday but I wanted to make sure."  
"I'm fine."

"Are you staying for dinner, Akari-chan?" Mrs. Shindou feels better with the young girl around. She's almost like the daughter she never had.  
"If that's alright."  
"You know it is, dear. Go ahead and call your mother."  
"Thank you! I'll meet you in your room, Hikaru."  
"Yeah, sure."

Hikaru makes his way to his room then sits on his bed to wait for her.   
He's had a busy day. His time at the Go class didn't go as he thought it would have. He still isn't sure why he went at all.

The boy stares at his dominant hand. He can still feel the weight of the stone between his fingers.

"Does your hand hurt, Hikaru?" The boy jumps at the sudden sound of his friend's voice.  
"Don't scare me like that!" Akari giggles.  
"Sorry, you were zoned out." Hikaru huffs and puts his hand down.  
"No, I was just thinking about Go class." The girl plops onto the bed next to him, giving him a curious stare.  
"What happened?"

Hikaru lies back with his hands behind his head and mint green eyes closed. "There was this guy there picking on weaker players."  
"Did you tell the teacher?"  
"Nah, I made his wig come off instead."  
"Hikaru! That wasn't nice," she reprimanded while attempting not to laugh. Hikaru opens his eyes and grins at her.  
"Yeah, I know, I went too far. But he made me so angry." He gazes up at the ceiling. "He was a lot better than his opponent, but he was playing a horrible game. He was taking advantage of the other guy and confusing him. It was mean-spirited!"

Akari gawks at him. "Are you really Hikaru?"  
"Huh?" He sits up in surprise. "What do you mean?"  
"That didn't sound like something the Hikaru I know would say. You're talking like another person." Akari is perplexed. This boy looks like Hikaru and sounds like Hikaru, but he's not the Hikaru she's grown up with. Those words were not that of a twelve-year-old. For a moment he sounded much older, and it scared her.

The girl jerks to her feet. "I'm going to see if your mom needs help in the kitchen. I'll get you for dinner!" Hikaru stares after her in confusion.  
"Akari...?"

Hikaru rest his elbows on his knees and stares at the floor between his feet. "Is something wrong with me?" He examines his hand, eyes naturally traveling to the fingers that hold the stones. A part of him knows that as he plays, the nail of his index will be worn down. He fists his hand and tears his eyes away. "These aren't my thoughts, they're not." The boy flings himself back on his bed again. "I am Shindou Hikaru, right?"

~

The room was large and rich. It was intimidating to those who were not used to the life at court. The boy was watching the Go game too intensely to pay any mind to the wealth, to the influential men and women or their expensive court robes, or even to the Emperor himself who sat behind the silk curtains that concealed him from public view.

The boy understood how important this game was. It was a game of honor, of life and death. Fujiwara-sensei had been challenged by Taira-sama to become the Emperor's sole Go Instructor, and losing here could mean ruin.

That's when he happened to see it. He noticed Fujiwara's expression change, then followed the man's eyes to Taira-sama's go-ke. One of his teacher's white stones was mixed in his opponent's black ones. It wouldn't have been a problem, as stones did occasionally stray, but Taira-sama slipped the white stone into his prisoner bowl.

Taira-sama was cheating!

Then his teacher was back at the river bank, and his star-like tears were falling into the cold embrace of the river.

~

"SENSEI!" Hikari cries out as he jolts awake, upright and an arm outstretched for a man he doesn't know. Sweat has soaked his hair and clothes, and it clings to his skin in a thin layer. He puts a hand to his chest, trying to calm down his racing heart that's still pounding to the terror he had just experienced in his dream. "Who... Who the heck is Fujiwara...?"

Fujiwara.  
Fujiwara no Sai.

"Why do I know you?"


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would just like to remind everyone that this fic is meant to follow the manga, so I will be borrowing some lines and events directly from it.

“Hikaru, let’s play again six months from now.”

The memory keeps invading Hikaru’s thoughts as he does his social studies homework. When he had played his grandfather the other day, the man had stopped their game only a few moves in. Hikaru’s thoughts had felt sluggish when they started playing, like he had been waddling through a mountain of sand. “I must have been taking too long to make my moves,” he says to himself. He shakes his head hard. “Well duh! I don’t even know the first thing about Go! Why did I even go to that Go class last week?! That settles it, I’m never playing again!”

As soon as the words leave his mouth, he feels that strange illness again; a deep sadness that has taken residence in his very core.

Hikaru hugs himself, his fingers digging into his arms. “What’s happening to me?”

In spite of his earlier reservations, Hikaru keeps his appointment at the Go class. “Man, why’d I come so early?”  
“Hello, Hikaru!” greets Mrs. Sagawa. She’s an elderly woman who made friends with him at his first class because he’s the same age as her grandson.  
“Hi.” He spots Mr. Shirakawa, the Go class instructor. “Ah, Shirakawa-sensei!” Hikaru runs up to the man. He’s only in his twenties with a baby-face, glasses, and short wavy hair that curls outwards on the ends.  
“It’s good to see you back, Hikaru. How can I help you?”  
“Um... Have you heard of someone named Fujiwara no Sai?”  
“Fujiwara no Sai?” He gives the boy a perplexed look, wondering why he’s asking him that. “No, I haven’t. Does this person have something to do with Go?”  
“Oh, it’s doesn’t matter.” Hikaru backs away, wondering why he asked the Go instructor in the first place. “Forget I mentioned it. I’ll see you in class.” He hurries off towards the vending machines.

Hikaru leans against one of the machines, breathing harder than he should be. “I don’t get it.” He runs his fingers through his blond bangs then buys himself a soft drink to calm him down. He’s watching the orange liquid pour into the cup when he hears Mrs. Sagawa. “Oh, the Tengen match is on TV!” The boy looks up at the television mounted on the wall. “Hikaru, have you heard of Touya Meijin? They say he’s the closest to having played the Divine Move! I’m a big fan of his!”  
“The Divine Move...?” He raises his green eyes to the screen, and loses his breath.

The pattern of the black and white stones, the intense expression on Touya Meijin’s face, the smoothness and surety the man uses to make his moves. “His play... far exceeds the level of a Meijin.”  
“Oh, so you do know him, Hikaru. Isn’t he wonderful?” Mrs. Sagawa’s words shock him out of his strange mood.  
“Ah, I don’t know him that well or nothing.” He covers up his confusion by grabbing his drink and taking several large gulps.  
“That’s exactly how my grandson is. That can’t be good for you drinking it like that. Ah, Mr. Akoto!” Hikaru doesn’t notice the woman’s sudden pause after her greeting, he can only think of how he’s supposed to apologize to the rude wig man like Shirakawa told him to.  
“Hello, there!” greets the man with a big grin. Akota’s new wig, and it obviously is a wig, is gleaming in the artificial light.

Hikaru is so surprised that he begins laughing, accidentally spitting his soda all over Mister Akota. “HA HA HA!”  
“What’s the big idea?!” bellows the outraged man, now soaking wet with sticky soda.  
“I couldn’t help it! You switched wigs on me!” Hikaru is desperately trying to stop laughing, but isn’t finding any success.  
“How rude,” snorts Akota as he pulls out his handkerchief to wipe himself off with. “Kids these days don’t have any manners!” He tries to clean his false hair, accidentally causing the wig to drop off his head. The man screams and runs out in embarrassment. “Aaaaaaagh!”  
“Thanks, Mr. Akota! I’m looking forward to seeing your new wig next week!” Hikaru shouts at the disappearing figure.

“Now, Hikaru, I think you were a bit harsh,” Mrs. Sagawa says between giggles. “Uh oh.” The woman’s stare causes Hikaru to look over his shoulder, right where Shirakawa is looming over him.  
“HIKARU!”  
“S-sensei...”  
“You were making fun of Mr. Akota again!” His yelling is loud enough to be heard outside of the building. “That’s it! No class for you, today!”  
“I didn’t do it on purpose!” Hikaru protests to no avail. He slumps against the back of a chair as Shirakawa-sensei storms off to the classroom. “Darn!”

“Don’t take it so hard, Hikaru.” Mrs. Sagawa tries to comfort the boy. “Shirakawa-sensei’s just trying to do what’s best for you.”  
“I just want to learn how to play Go.”  
“Well,” Sagawa says after a minute, “there is a Go Salon in front of the train station.”  
“The train station?” Hikaru straightens his posture, looking to the woman with hope in his green eyes.  
“Yes, but only really strong players go to that one. I don’t think you’re ready yet.”  
“Let’s go!” Hikaru is out the door in a flash.  
“It’s good he’s so energetic, but I hope he doesn’t get hurt...”

The Go Salon isn’t like any place he’s ever been to before, even the Go class. The sound of stones clacking on wooden boards is prevalent, but so is the smell of old men. It’s such a surprise to see a sea of old folks that Hikaru almost falls right over at the sight.

“Hello,” greets the receptionist. At least she isn’t an old guy. Actually she’s rather pretty and still in her twenties. “Write your name down here please. Is this your first time here?”  
“This is all new to me,” Hikaru admits. “Can anybody play here?” He picks up the pen on the counter and signs where she points on a sheet of paper.  
“Sure. How strong of a player are you?”  
“Um, I’m not sure. I’ve never played against anybody, but I think I’m pretty good.” The lady giggles something he doesn’t quite catch as he looks around the place again, trying to find someone not already engaged in a game. “Hey! There’s a kid over there!” The prospect of playing suddenly looks a lot better to Hikaru. He’s still not sure what he wants to play at all, but he’d rather do it with someone his own age than an old man.

The boy looks up from where he’s sitting when he hears the shout. He looks to be Hikaru’s age, with pale skin from always being indoors and dark green hair in a pageboy with matching green eyes. “Are you looking for someone to play?” He stands up and walks over to Hikaru. “I’ll play you.” Hikaru throws up his arms in a cheer.  
“Great! It’s more fun playing against someone your own age!”  
“Let’s play back there. I’m Touya Akira.”  
“I’m Shindou Hikaru. I’m in the 6th grade.”  
“Hey, so am I!” Akira answers cheerfully back.

~

“...-kun? Are you well?” A cool hand touches his forehead. It’s soft except from a callus on the fore finger. “This is no good, you have a fever. You’ll have to rest today, possibly tomorrow.”  
“But I want to play, Fujiwara-sensei.”  
“You can’t play a good game in your condition.” Lips touch his brow, infinitely softer than even those graceful hands. “Rest now. There’s no shame in it.”

~

His dreams haven’t been so bad lately. They have only been tidbits of his dream character’s life, not the dramatic ones he had had a lot of in the beginning.  
“Maybe I should start writing this stuff down?”

“What was that, Hikaru?” Hikaru jumps at the sound of Akari’s voice. He forgot that they are eating lunch together in the courtyard since the weather is still good.  
“Nothing.”  
“Come on, I know you said something about writing something down. What is it?” Normally Akari isn’t so pushy once Hikaru dismisses a subject, but her dear friend has been drifting away from her and becoming distant. She wants him to open up again.  
“I’ve just been having these dreams,” Hikaru finally relents as he eats some carrot slices. “I think it’s a story. Nothing special.”  
“But that’s cool! You should write it down!”

He looks thoughtful as he chews, turning the idea over in his head. Why not write it down? He can still remember all of the details.  
The feel of the wind, the smell of flowers like perfume.  
Painted lips and violet eyes.

Suddenly Hikaru’s mouth is dry, and he can’t figure out a reason for it.

“Hey, Akari.”  
“Yeah?” She pours some juice from a thermos into a Styrofoam cup and offers it to Hikaru. He takes it and gulps it down before continuing.  
“I’m going to go watch a local Go Tournament this Sunday. Wanna come with?” The girl frowns into her cup so her friend can’t see it. She hopes her expression is neutral when she looks at him again.  
“A Go tournament?”  
“Yup. It’s for kids only. I thought I’d check it out.”  
“I’ll have to check with mom first. How long is it?” Hikaru shrugs.  
“I dunno. We can leave if it’s boring or something.”

The bell chimes to signal the end of lunch. They gather their trash and head back inside.

“Hikaru?”  
“Yeah, Akari?” She doesn’t answer right away, and Hikaru starts to get impatient after a minute. “Akari?”  
“Nothing. I’ll see you after school.”

 

Hikaru flops down onto his bed, glad to finally be home from his long day at school. Even if his dreams have toned down, the week itself has been pretty stressful. He keeps thinking back to the game he played with Akira at the Go Salon. He didn’t really understand who had won, but he had the feeling it had been a good game. He wonders how he could have played differently, and how Akira might have responded in turn.

He grabs his pillow and hits himself in the face. “Stop it! Just stop thinking about it! It doesn’t make sense!” He rolls onto his side, hugging the pillow to his chest. “None of this makes sense at all. I never learned Go, so how come I can play it?”

The alien yet familiar thoughts, the odd dreams that are like memories... It’s all starting to scare him as much as it calms him. “My head feels all muddied up.”

~

“Why do you play Go, ...-kun?” Fujiwara was haloed by the sunset, his white robes dyed red and orange. His ever present fan was held loosely in his left hand, the delicate wrist bent in the graceful curve of a swan’s neck.  
“Why do I play?” the boy said softly, almost as if asking himself. “It looked like... his fingers were glowing.” He looked at his playing hand, staring at his fingertips. The nails were cut short, and were worn from the handling of stones. “He snapped the stone onto the board, and I saw them glow. I want to be able to do that.”

Purple lips smiled. The boy felt his cheeks warm at the sight. “Then,” his sensei said while closing his fan with a soft snap, “you play because the game called out to you.”

~

Despite his reservations, Hikaru finds himself at the youth Go tournament. Akari decided to accompany him after all and is standing just behind him as they enter the large building that is the Japan Go Center.  
Hikaru doesn’t know about his friend, but to him the room is filled with an almost mystical tension. Even the children younger than them are enveloped in electrifying auras.

“I don’t really get what’s going on,” Akari says after a moment, “but they’re really into it.”  
“Yeah. It’s incredible.” Akari frowns a little, but then she smiles and nods.  
“I guess it is. I don’t think I’ve ever done something with this much intensity.” She nudges her friend with an elbow. “But you know, Hikaru, you used to play soccer like this.”  
“Did I?” Right now, Hikaru can’t imagine playing anything except Go on such a level.

The pair walks down the aisles of players, peeking in at the on-going games. Hikaru pauses. Something about the game is bothering him, like having a word on the tip of his tongue.

‘Black must make a crucial move in the top left corner or he will die there.’

He’s stopped questioning the strange whispers, finding it easier to just listen to them when they come. He glances to the top left, and has that feeling of something being wrong again. ‘The 2-1 point,’ the voice continues.  
‘Oh, I see,’ he thinks, as if responding. The player places down his stone in the 3-1 position. “Oops, one point too low. That’s too bad.”

Too late Hikaru realizes he had said that out loud. He slaps his hands over his mouth but the damage is already done.

A man wearing a colored armband that designates him as a tournament official grabs the boy by his arm. “You there! What’s wrong with you?! You’re not supposed to kibitz in the middle of a tournament match!”  
“I-I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to! It just slipped out!” A blond man in a white suit walks over, telling the other man, Mori, to calm down.  
“Ogata-sensei, I’ll deal with this boy in the other room!”  
“Yes.” The blond man then turns to the children whose game was interrupted. “So tell me what just happened here?”

“I can’t believe this!” Akari runs to catch up with Mori and her friend. “What did you do now?!”

Hikaru feels terrible for messing up that game, more so because he has a strange lingering feeling that he may have disappointed someone important. “This is a very serious matter, young man,” says an elder gentleman, presumably the head official, after hearing the problem from Mori. “These players take this tournament very seriously.” The boy bows in apology to the tournament officials.  
“I’m really very sorry!” Akari bows too.  
“I’m sorry for him too. His mouth doesn’t always consult with his brain before speaking.”  
“You don’t have to say it like that,” Hikaru grumbles, but he doesn’t disagree.

“Well, why don’t you leave from the rear exit?” one of the men suggests. “That will do, won’t it, Kakimoto-sensei?”  
“I suppose so,” answers the head official.  
“Sorry I caused so much trouble,” Hikaru shouts over his shoulder as Akari drags him out the door.

The girl sighs and releases his arm once the door is firmly shut behind them. Hikaru rubs the back of his head. “I feel bad… My mouth just went on autopilot.”  
“I don’t even understand the game and I feel bad for those boys.”

As they come to a corner, Hikaru runs right into a tall, solid body. “Ouch!” The boy falls over, landing on his bottom.  
“Are you okay?” Akari kneels besides him.  
“Yeah...” He glances up and feels lightning tear through every one of his nerves. Standing above him like a God is the one called Touya Meijin, giving off an aura of impenetrable strength.  
“Careful now,” the man says before moving aside and continuing down the hall.  
“I thought he was going to yell at you,” Akari comments in a low whisper. “Hikaru?” Hikaru is still watching the broad back of Touya Meijin, forgetting his friend is even there.  
“That man... he’s the closest to playing the Divine Move.”  
“What?” Akari shakes her friend. “Hikaru, snap out of it!”  
“Huh? Oh, sorry.” He picks himself off the floor. “Come on, let’s get out of here.”

Hikaru glances back one more time, but Touya Meijin is already gone.


	4. Chapter 4

The air smells of rain.

“Hikaru, hurry up! It’s going to start pouring any minute!” Akari jogs on the balls of her feet, hoping that she’s conveying enough of her urgency to rub off onto Hikaru.  
“Go on ahead of me.” The girl’s right cheek puffs out in a pout.  
“Hikaru, don’t be so gloomy! I’m sure there are other tournaments.” Hikaru doesn’t respond as he continues his snail pace, staring at the ground in front of him as he walks. Akari stomps her foot in anger. “I’ve had it with you, Hikaru! All you’ve done is be really moody since you started that old man’s game! You should quit Go!”

The bottom drops from Hikaru’s stomach at those words. It’s like he’s falling through a great abyss with no end and no relief. The cold claws into his bones and freezes him from the inside.

‘I can’t.’ The thought echoes, pounding against the sides of his skull. ‘I can’t, not until... Not until...’

“I’m going home!” Akari shout as she turns on her heel. She doesn’t see her friend stumble then sink to his knees like an aged man carrying too heavy a burden. He leans against a telephone pole as she disappears down the subway stairs.

It’s quiet, like a blanket has been wrapped around his head and muffled all of his senses. Quiet except for the rhythmic clacking of stones.

~

“You look contemplative today, ...-kun. What has captured your thoughts?” Fujiwara had his usual fan out and tapped the end of it against the boy’s temple to emphasize his wonder.  
“They’re foolish thoughts, Fujiwara-sensei.”  
“Let me be the judge of that.” The boy was silent for only a moment before he sighed and gazed up at his teacher.  
“Will I ever be good at Go, Fujiwara-sensei?”

The man seemed to be caught by surprise at the inquiry, but he did not react right away. Instead he stared at his pupil and seriously thought about the boy’s question. “It is not something I can say for certain, ...-kun, as talent is a whim of the Gods. However, I do know that your love for the game is great, and you are a hard worker.”

The boy felt something ease inside of him at those words. “Thank you, Fujiwara-sensei.” The fan snapped open, and the boy knew that his teacher must be smiling behind it.  
“Now, shall we play a game?”

~

“Shindou Hikaru?” Then all at once that voice snaps the world back into place with a disorienting cyclone of sight and sound. Hikaru holds his head a moment before peeking out from between his fingers at the person kneeling in front of him.  
“Touya Akira? What are you doing here?” He sits up and stares at the boy from the Go Salon, still wearing his pristine school uniform.  
“Me? What about you?” Hikaru blinks as he realizes he’s sitting on the sidewalk.  
“Oh... I got dizzy. I’m okay now.” He pushes to his feet and slaps the dust off his pants. “Were you playing in the Youth Go Tournament?” Akira stands as well, still staring.  
“Were you playing in it?”  
“Me? No, I just took a quick look in there.”

The silence that follows those words is awkward for both boys.

“Are you going to become a Pro?” Hikaru gawks at Akira. His first instinct is to laugh it off as the most ridiculous thing he’s ever heard, but a deeper part of him is practically screaming ‘YES!’ in his head.  
“It’s never crossed my mind,” Hikaru finally says after a moment to ward off a potential headache. “What about you?”  
“Of course I am.”

The certainty that Akira answers with leaves Hikaru speechless again. He thinks a moment about the scenario of becoming a Pro. He knows they make money playing in tournaments, although he isn’t sure how much, and he knows they have to play lots of games to rise in rank and to win titles. The sound of stones fills his ear again. A strange feeling like nostalgia settles in his chest although he can’t think for the life of him why it’s there at all. His emotions are mixed up inside his body once more but there seem to be several positive ones sitting atop of the sadness that lines the bottom of his belly.

“Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to dabble around and become a Pro, maybe win a title or two.” The words sound hollow as soon as he says them, and that deep part of him wishes they had never been said. The sentiment only confuses him more. Then Akira is suddenly in his face, his eyes burning like a great beast that’s been wronged.  
“You’ve just insulted every professional Go player out there!” Hikaru stumbles back from those scorching green eyes. “Anyone who really plays the game would never say anything so inexcusable!”  
“But I... I didn’t mean...!” The boy can’t form any coherent words as Akira continues yelling at him. He’s been totally thrown off balance from his bewildering emotions and the overwhelming fervor from the green-haired boy.

It’s like he’s being stared down upon from somewhere high by a lion, no... A dragon. Akira is baring his fangs and claws, his muscled tail stirring up hurricanes and tsunamis. ‘I want to play.’ The thought echoes loudly in his ears like the beating of thunderous drums, pounding over even the dragon’s roaring challenge. The scent of Sakura has wrapped around him. ‘I want to play him. I want to play this dragon.’

Thunder crashes above them, the dragon extends a claw. “Let’s play a game right now!” The sky breaks open, pouring down numbing pellets of cold rain but it does nothing to cool Akira’s fury or the growing desire in Hikaru’s chest. The fire spreads until it engulfs his whole being and his hand takes Akira’s on its own accord.

~

Fujiwara guided his movements through a teaching game. Words were not needed, only the flow of stones.

The boy concentrated to further his study of moves and the game. Sweat beaded his brow and trickled down his neck to soak into the material of his robes. He needed to see further ahead, he needed to better understand the flow of energy that connected the stones. He could almost see shining lines jumping from one to the next, forming great rivers that transverse the harshest of landscapes. But mighty walls were cutting his rivers off, stopping them from growing and triumphing over the earth. Huge walls that they may never be able to overcome.

He bowed his head at his inevitable defeat, smiling at the bitter sweetness.

~

“I resign...”

Hikaru blinks in surprise. “Huh?” Before his puzzled gaze, the mighty dragon lowers his regal head. “Akira?” Hikaru looks down at their game. They had only played about half of what they did the time before. He doesn’t understand how he could have won already, or at all for that matter.

The men who had been watching the game are quiet and solemn, staring from Hikaru and Akira to the game board in bewilderment. The silence cuts into Hikaru when the other boy continues to be unresponsive. He jumps to his feet, desperate for that numbing quiet to be broken. 

“You’re really something, Akira! You’re so intense, I felt the pressure with every move!” Every syllable feels like a frantic cry that will never be heard. Hikaru’s voice trembles as he loses the wind in his sails. “You were really great...” Akira doesn’t move, doesn’t say anything. Feeling as if he had been the one to have lost, Hikaru turns away crestfallen. “I’m going home... See ya...”

The salon’s door opens and closes with a swish, a resounding click behind him.

 

The following day at school crawls by in a haze. The only thing on Hikaru’s mind is Touya Akira. “Why did I have to do that?”  
“Do what, Hikaru?” The blond-bang boy almost jumps at Akari’s voice. He had lost track of where they are, namely gym.  
“Oh, uh, nothing.”  
“If you say so,” the girl says with a small frown on her lips. “Hikaru, it’s a free day, we should play together.”  
“I don’t feel like playing, Akari.” The girl’s frown grows stronger.  
“You’re being so weird, Hikaru!”

The boy’s head suddenly snaps up. His gaze jerks around, but there’s nothing there than the usual students.

“Hikaru? Hikaru, what’s wrong?”  
“I... Nothing.” The scent of Sakura has enveloped him, but it’s still the wrong time of year. Hikaru rubs his face with both hands and mentally chants to himself. ‘There’s no Sakura, there’s no Fujiwara-sensei. He’s not real, they’re just dreams.’ A tremble runs through his body like he’s been sitting in a cold rain.

“Hikaru?!” Akari’s hands are on his shoulders, shaking him.  
“W-what?! What is it?!” he shouts in surprise. Akari’s soft brown eyes are wide and anxious.  
“Hikaru, you’re crying!”  
“What...?” The boy touches his face, finding it is indeed wet. “Why?”

Akari heaves him to his feet. “We’re going to the nurse! Something’s really wrong with you!”  
“Ack! Hey, stop!” Hikaru’s startled shouts don’t prevent the girl from dragging her friend out of the gym with a quick call to the coach. “C’mon, stop it! I don’t need the nurse, I just got something in my eyes!”

Hikaru spots his salvation, and with a quick jerk he yanks his hand free then runs into the boy’s bathroom. He’s running so fast that he almost slams into the far wall from not being able to stop. “Ah!” He flings his arms back to shift his weight and stumbles several steps. “Too close, that would’ve been stupid to do.” He sighs and shuffles over to the sinks to wash his face. He sucks in a sharp breath, his green eyes widening.

In the mirror is a boy his age wearing a black and blue kimono, his black hair tied into twin braided loops on either side of his head. “What the?!” Hikaru jumps back in surprise. The boy in the mirror speaks, and although Hikaru can’t hear him he can still understand what’s being said.  
‘Do you remember?’  
“Remember what...?” Behind the boy in the mirror appears a tall man with long hair and violet eyes.

Hikaru screams and runs out of the bathroom. “The school’s haunted!”

 

“Hikaru, are you sure you’re okay?” Akari is following at her friend’s heels like a worried puppy as they walk home from school. Not only did Hikaru’s screaming in the halls disrupt several classes, but it prompted the school security to search every nook and cranny to make sure there wasn’t a stranger in their midst. The adults were certain that Hikaru had either seen something ordinary at a strange angle or there had been someone else there that had been scared away when Hikaru ran out yelling. No one believed his story of a ghost in the mirror.

“I’m fine,” Hikaru says in an irate manner. He understands well enough that he’s a child by every standard there is, but that doesn’t mean he likes being belittled. He knows what he saw and he’s not a liar! He groans to himself and rubs a hand over his face. “Now I’m a laughingstock.”

“Have you been sleeping, Hikaru?” Akari asks him again for what seems like the hundredth time. Hikaru’s been avoiding answering her, certain that she’ll twist it to fit one of the teacher’s theories that he hadn’t really seen anything at all. “Hikaru, come on!”  
“No! I haven’t been sleeping!” he bellows out with all the frustration that has been building up in his small body. “How can I when I keep having nightmares?!”  
“Hi-Hikaru...” The sudden shout catches Akari off-guard, making her voice stutter as she pulls together a reply. “Maybe you should go to the doctor?”  
“I don’t need a stupid doctor, I need to be left alone.” Hikaru digs his hands deeper into his pants pockets and hunches his shoulders more.

“Hikaru, where are you going? This is the way home.” The girl tries to get his attention but Hikaru only ignores her. “Hikaru!”  
“I’m not going home right now,” he says as he continues to walk away.

The blond-bang boy looks around at the familiar buildings. His green eyes find the Go Salon without trying, and he can’t help the memory of his most recent game. The blazing intensity that had enveloped Akira’s entire being, as well as the deafening silence at the Dragon’s defeat. Hikaru turns away, intent on going somewhere else when a man in a white suit dashes up to him. He looks vaguely familiar to Hikaru but he can’t place him at the moment.

“It is you!” the man cries as he snatches Hikaru by the arm.  
“What’s the big idea? Let go!” But the blond man ignores the plea as he drags him towards the Go Salon.  
“Come with me, there’s someone who’s been wanting to meet you.”  
“Huh? Who?” The boy can’t think of anyone who would want to meet him in such a fashion. “Ouch! Slow down!” he complains as his arm is continually pulled on even as they go up the stairs and through the entry doors.  
“Meijin! Touya Meijin, he’s here! That boy, I found him!”

Further complaints stilled on Hikaru’s tongue when he catches sight of the stately man wearing traditional robes. The sound of a stone clacks on the Go board where he had been leading two men in a discussion of the game they had just played.

“Touya Meijin...?” The breath leaves his body, making him lightheaded. The family name is a dead giveaway that he must be Akira’s father, Hikaru can’t figure out why he hadn’t made the connection earlier, but he also recognizes the noble man from before. “You’re the closest to the Divine Move, the Hand of God.”

“So that’s the boy who beat Akira. Not once, but twice.” He places another stone onto the board before turning his sharp eyes on Hikaru. The boy feels his heart stop then jump into his throat. The man’s aura is overwhelming. Hikaru doesn’t know how he’s still managing to stand in the Meijin’s presence. “Well then, let’s see how good you are. Have a seat.”

A part of the boy wants to refuse. He feels out-of-place with this man that carries himself like a God, but another part of him... The part that hears the clacking of stones in his sleep, the part that understands the flow of a game, the part that goes cold and sorrowful when he thinks of stopping... That part wants to play, to challenge this behemoth.

Hikaru takes the seat offered him, feeling like someone is watching over his shoulder, ready to guide his hand. But he still feels like he doesn’t belong.

“Put down three stones,” Touya Meijin says as he takes his seat across from the boy. “That’s how I play Akira. Three stones against the holder of the Meijin title. Do you know what that means? That’s how good Akira is.”

Hikaru feels even more uncertain as they begin. ‘Why am I here? I won those games by accident, I didn’t know what I was doing,’ he whines silently to himself. He feels awful inside, like he just pulled a nasty trick on someone and they were hurt in the process. ‘Why am I playing?’

He stares at the board in a forlorn manner, then the first stone is snapped onto the wooden surface. The boy gasps in surprise. It was so sharp and neat how it was placed. The Meijin’s words tumble over him as they take their turns; Hikaru can only watch the man, watch his fingers as they hold the stones.

‘It’s like his fingertips are glowing.’ His voice is whispering in awe even in his own mind. The image is burnt into his memory, bringing forth powerful emotions he can’t begin to interpret. ‘He takes the stone in between pliant fingers and releases the stone above the board.’ Another is snapped down, blazing a trail like a shooting star. Hikaru’s heart pounds in his chest and the blood roars in his head. ‘I want to be able to do that.’ He lifts his black stone from the go-ke, holding it properly between his index and middle finger. ‘I want to be able to snap a stone down like that!’

CLACK!

With the sound echoing in his ears, Hikaru can hear a smiling voice speaking to him.

‘You play because the game called out to you.’


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was twice as long as it is now, but I realized it needed to be cut in half. Expect chapter 6 soon. :)

It feels like his fingertips are tingling. The sensation runs down his arm and into his chest then spreads to the rest of his body. Hikaru lifts his hand, staring at it with too many raging emotions he can’t begin to understand.

BEEP BEEP!

The boy jerks in surprise, disrupting the stones on the board. The frantic beeping of someone’s watch reminds him of the time. His gaze locks on the clock face on the wall, and then he jumps to his feet. “Crap! I’m in trouble!” The blond man calls out something, but he’s in too much of a hurry to hear a word of it.

Once he’s home, Hikaru feels the hairs on the back of his neck prickle before he has even touched the door. His mother, normally mild-mannered, yanks him inside by the arm. He doesn’t have the chance to appreciate how nice the house smells before she starts in on him. “I can’t believe your behavior lately, Hikaru! Akari-chan came to me crying!”  
“Ow! I don’t know why she’s crying!”  
“Disrupting the school, frequent visits to the school nurse, disappearing after classes, and your coach called to say you’re thinking of quitting soccer! What’s happening?” His mother stops in the middle of the hall and hugs him tight. “Akari-chan told me you’ve been having nightmares.”

The boy is confused by the sudden change in gears from his mother’s anger to her concern. “They’re… they’re not a big deal,” he answers in a small voice after a long moment.  
“Your father is supposed to be home early today. We’ll talk as a family after dinner.” She pulls away enough to look him in the face. Her eyes are filled with worry.  
“It’s not necessary, mom. Really. I’m… I’m just working through some stuff. Nothing’s going on…” 

It isn’t really a lie. No one is bullying him and his grades are up. A little lost sleep isn’t something to complain about.

Hikaru blinks to himself at the stray thought, his mother’s comforting words a low droning in his ears when she hugs him again. When did he start thinking like this? It wasn’t long ago that a lack of sleep was something to bring up. He’s never taken a lack of sleep well.

‘Is something wrong with me?’ He presses closer to his mother. ‘Why is this happening?’ His eyes squeeze shut. ‘I don’t want mom to think I’m going crazy. They’re just dreams! I can’t tell her!’ He takes a breath and braces himself. “I’m fine, I really am. I’ve just been a bit sick, nothing to worry about.” He plasters on a big grin for good measure. ‘I’m sorry,’ he chants to himself. ‘I’m sorry that something’s wrong with me.’  
“I’ll set an appointment with the doctor.”  
“No no, it’s nothing like that,” Hikaru insists.

It takes several more minutes but Mrs. Shindou finally calms down.

Dinner isn’t ready yet, so on his mother’s suggestion Hikaru walks to Akari’s to apologize for worrying her. Normally, he would have complained and thrown a fit, but the situation is beginning to weigh heavily on his small shoulders.

As he waits for someone to answer the door, he stares down at his hands and flexes his fingers. His green eyes lose focus, and the world around him fades away.

~

The body was his and yet it wasn’t his. It was too big, too old. His hair was too long and his voice sounded too deep. But his hands moved when he wanted them to, and his legs were trembling with the strain they were under. The heat on his skin was too real to dismiss.

The wood of the door frame was beginning to buckle from the strikes it was enduring. ‘I have to hide the evidence.’ Voices were shouting at him but he couldn’t make out the garbled words. He looked down at the book in his too large hands.

‘I have to hide this before they kill me.’

~

“Hikaru? Hikaru!” Akari raises her level of volume each time she says Hikaru's name until she finally gets his attention. Her friend blinks and shakes his head as if he had been in a daze. His mint green eyes, that had been empty and faraway, regain their sparkle of life. He glances up at her.

"Oh, sorry." He scratches the back of his neck. "I think I was day dreaming." Strangely, he can’t seem to remember what it was about when he usually has trouble forgetting his dreams. He recalls heat, and that he had been holding something like a book. The book had felt important.  
"I noticed." Her expression shows her concern.  
"Uh, look," Hikaru says after a moment, while trying to shake off the feelings of fear and desperation from his dream. The worry etched on her face is making him even more uncomfortable. "I'm sorry about earlier. I was just in a bad mood."

“Are you really okay, Hikaru?” After a moment of hesitation she rests her hands on his shoulders. “You were… You seem to be in pain.”

For a moment, Hikaru’s gaze drops, but then he abruptly perks up with a grin on his face. “Let’s walk to the festival together.”  
“Huh?” Akari is thrown off-balance by the change in subject. “Uh, yeah, sure. I had wanted to ask you about that earlier.”  
“That settles it, then. I’ll pick you up at seven.” He pats one of her hands before stepping away with a wave. “See you in the morning.”  
“Um, bye.” She watches him trot off, frowning with uneasiness.

Hikaru loses the smile once he’s out of sight of her. “The festival... what a bother it’s going to be. Who the heck wants to be a gofer during a celebration?”

This year, rather than hold a traditional booth for guests to visit, his class is going to fill in the role of helpers to make sure things run smoothly for everyone. Hikaru had been one of the students to protest, but the vote in favor of the idea had won by a landslide.

He sighs in remembered defeat. “Oh well. Maybe I can hide somewhere until it’s over?” Another sigh escapes him as he finally reaches his house and goes inside. “I’m back.”

“Welcome home,” Mrs. Shindou calls from another room. “How was Akari-chan?”  
“She’s fine, mom, we cleared up the misunderstanding. I’m walking her to the festival.”  
“That’s good, Hikaru, very mature.” His mother steps out of the kitchen. “I called your father. He said he’ll be home soon.”  
“Okay. I’ll be in my room until dinner.” He kicks off his shoes then hurries up the stairs. “It’ll be amazing if that workaholic is actually here for dinner.”

When he reaches his room he pulls out a square piece of cardboard he had drawn a Go board onto, along with two small tins that contain buttons. One has black and the other has white. “I can’t believe I made this. What was I thinking?” He snags a book off of a shelf before he plops onto his bed.

Hikaru opens his Beginner’s Igo manual and begins to follow the next lesson. He has homework to do, but he can’t possibly concentrate on history or vocabulary right now. It still feels the need to do something, but he can’t place what.

“I wonder if Touya-san is playing…?” He drops the black button back into its container and stares across his makeshift board. “Did I do him wrong? Was I wrong, Fujiwara-sensei?” He can see the beautiful man from his dreams, sitting in front of him with his fan unfolded. “The dragon… He made me cut off his head, but the silence was deafening.”

Fujiwara-sensei folded his fan and lifted Hikaru’s chin with the tip of it. When green meets violet, the boy loses his breath. Purple lips curl into a smile just before Fujiwara uses his fan to tap the boy between the eyes.

Hikaru snaps awake from a rapping on his door. “It’s time for dinner!”  
“Coming,” he answers around a yawn. The buttons are scattered across his board and blanket. He must have fallen asleep while practicing. “Another weird dream.” He runs his hands over his face and rubs his eyes with the heels of his palms. “I need to stop having these things.”

The house smells more wonderful than before. Mrs. Shindou places down several plates of traditional Japanese dishes that she had slaved over all day. Hikaru eyes them like a wolf. He hadn’t realized how hungry he is. “Looks great, mom!” For the meantime, his troubles seem far away.  
“Thank you.” She scoops up some food and places it on Hikaru’s plate, Then she makes up a second plate that she covers with a plastic lid. It’s placed at the head of the table where Hikaru’s father is supposed to be. She fixes her own plate before sitting from across her son. “Is there anything you want to talk about before your father gets here?”

Hikaru stares at his meal, his chopsticks posed over a delicious strip of meat. “I still like soccer,” he begins.  
“Did something happen on the team?”  
“Nah, nothing like that.” He picks up the meat and eats it. Once he swallows he continues. “There are just other things I’d rather do now.”

His mother thoughtfully picks at her food for a moment. “You mean your Igo classes, right?”  
“Yeah.” A small, delighted smile overtakes his lips. “The teacher says I may have talent.”  
“Oh, well that’s nice. Are you enjoying yourself?”  
“Yup!”

Mrs. Shindou relaxes as dinner proceeds. Hikaru tells her about the game, although it’s all beyond her understanding, but she does love to hear how happy her son sounds while regaling some of the antics he and his classmates get into. “Hikaru! You shouldn’t spit soda on people!”  
“I didn’t mean to,” he defends with a laugh. “I was caught off guard because it was so shiny and fake!”

She tries to hold back a giggle, but it escapes anyway. “What about someone your own age? There are other young players, aren’t there?” Mrs. Shindou doesn’t really understand Igo, but she supposes that if someone Hikaru’s age can get into it, then it can’t be too difficult.  
“There is one guy.” The widest of grins stretches across her son’s face. As carefree as the boy normally is, she rarely sees this particular expression. There even appears to be a blush dusting his cheeks. “He’s really amazing. I’ve never met anyone who was so intense!”  
“He sounds like quite the young man. Maybe I should meet him,” she suggests.  
“I think you would get along better with Mrs. Sagawa, mom.”

Mr. Shindou finally shows up towards the end of dinner. But he doesn’t take a seat at the table, let alone bother with the covered meal waiting for him. “What’s this I hear about you causing trouble?”  
“Hello to you, too, dad.”

Hikaru is reprimanded by his mother for his disrespectful words and tone, but he can’t find it in himself to feel sorry at all. His father hasn’t been around much in over three years, with any number of broken promises trailing behind him. The man’s presence is almost nonexistent in the house. If not for a few pictures on the wall, and his slippers that are kept in the genkan, no one would suspect he has a dad.

“I won’t take that tone from you, young man,” he scolds. “Is this behavior why you’re in trouble?”  
“Honey, Hikaru isn’t in trouble,” his mother gently corrects. “I said he’s having trouble.”

The man pulls out his chair and sits on it heavily. “Is there a difference?” He pushes the plate of food away without looking at it. Anger makes Hikaru’s proverbial hackles rise.  
“Mom’s food is good, you know. When’s the last time you had her cooking?”  
“Hikaru, that wasn’t necessary,” Mrs. Shindou gasped in shock.

His father’s dark eyes flash with annoyance. “I’m not taking this attitude from you.”  
“Same here.” Mint green has hardened into Jade.

Mrs. Shindou quickly intervenes, standing from her seat. “Hikaru, go to your room while your father and I talk. I’ll call you down when it’s your turn.”  
“Sure, mom.” He bows his head to her, then leaves the room without granting his father the same courtesy. The man’s shouting is soon heard behind him even as he knows his mother is calmly pouring the man tea. The words delinquent, brat, and ungrateful are mixed with phrases like bad mother and bad influence. Hikaru almost runs back to kick him.

Once Hikaru has returned to his private sanctuary he cleans up the mess of buttons and gets his play set back in order. “I should do my homework,” he mutters to himself. His eyes lose focus. “The Gods don’t smile on those who aren’t diligent in their duties.”

He blinks and shakes his head. “What did I just say?”

It is half an hour later when his mother finally comes to get him. He puts down his vocabulary homework and joins her downstairs. His father, from the looks of it, has gone to bed. His meal is left abandoned on the table.

Hikaru doesn’t hide his scowl. Mrs. Shindou rests a kind hand on her son’s head. “He just wasn’t hungry, Hikaru.”  
“Why not? He knew he was supposed to eat dinner, didn’t he?” There’s a bitter taste in his mouth.  
“Please don’t be mad at your father. He works hard for us.”

“He works hard for himself.” He gazes up at her, the edges around his eyes hard. “He keeps talking about this promotion and that recommendation, and that’s why he’s never home, but have we ever seen anything from it?” His thoughts are clear, but they almost feel out-of-place in his head. There are more than his feelings of formless fury at his father’s absence. For some reason his father’s transgressions over the years are at the forefront of his memories, like someone is shuffling through them. Feelings of indignation and composed disgust at the man’s behavior towards himself and his mother begin to direct his immature emotions. “When did he last do you right in his husbandly duties?”

Mrs. Shindou pulls back in surprise at how adult Hikaru abruptly is in this moment. “H-Hikaru?”  
“It’s disgraceful, his behavior.” The disbelief on his mother’s face unnerves him, and he looks away. “Sorry.” He runs a hand through his blond bangs. It comes back covered in sweat. “I’ll have his leftovers for tomorrow’s bento. I have to get back to my homework. I’m fine without any advice from him.”

The boy rushes out of the room, just as confused as his mother over his choice of words.


	6. Chapter 6

“Your form is most important, …-kun.” Fujiwara-sensei corrected his posture and shifted the position of the biwa on his lap. “You cannot attract spirits if you do not get the form correct.”  
“Yes, Fujiwara-sensei.” The boy watched as those delicate, pale hands smoothed the wrinkles from his robes before adjusting the biwa one more time. “Why must I learn the biwa?”  
“Because I am the esteemed Emperor’s Igo instructor and you are my apprentice. You must come to understand that you are now part of a higher class than you were born to.” The boy did not feel like he was a higher class, but he accepted his master’s words. “Keep your posture and handle the biwa as I’ve shown you. Doing these things well will bring good karma. Good karma will give you more skill on the board.”  
“Yes, Fujiwara-sensei.”

“Once you have sufficiently mastered the biwa we will move on to the yokobue.” The boy mentally sighed as he continued to practice. He looked forward to learning the flute even less than he had the biwa. He only wanted to play Go and he didn’t understand how playing these instruments would help, karma or no karma.

~

Hikaru’s fingers have been twitching all morning, as if they’re desperate to perform some action. ‘I dreamt of playing the biwa. It was so real.’

“Does your hand hurt?”  
“Huh? Oh, no, Akari, I’m fine. I just slept on it funny.” Hikaru laughs to cover up his discomfort. “Anyway, I hope we don’t get hit with too many hard requests.”  
“I’m sure we’ll do just fine,” Akari answers with a perky smile. “Everyone wants the festival to go well. We’re going to be there to help the school and student body achieve that. It’s a very important job.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Hikaru regrets bringing it up as she continues on, but it’s a comfort to have her acting normal again as well.

It’s not long before the pair reaches their school and they sign in with their teacher. Once Hikaru and Akari receive their bright green arm bands with their class number embroidered on it, they’re sent out to patrol the school grounds.

“I heard some of the booths have students from my sister’s junior high school this year. Maybe we can ask them what it’s like.” Akari looks cheerful as she walks with Hikaru through the transformed schoolyard. There are decorations everywhere.  
“I guess,” Hikaru says after a moment. He can see a few of their classmates wondering around the booths, waiting for someone to call on their help like they are.

Most of the booths are food stalls, although since they’re being run by grade school students it’s mostly prepackaged lunches. There is a pancake stand and a takoyaki stand running fresh and hot. The delicious scent wafts by their noses and makes their stomachs growl.

“Akari you brought the coupons, right?”  
“I have them right here!” She pulls them from her skirt pocket and holds them up.  
“Great! I’ll meet you at the takoyaki stand. I have to piss first.”  
“Ewww, I didn’t need to know that,” Akari protests. Hikaru laughs and runs off ahead of her.

Hikaru pauses and watches a few people enter and exit the boy toilets. He is still nervous about going into the school’s restrooms after the ghost in the mirror incident. It’s not that either person had been particularly frightening, they had actually looked quite normal minus being several centuries behind the times, but rather it had been the shock of something beyond his understanding trying to communicate with him. His stomach had twisted like a pretzel and his lungs had contracted, he had even felt his eyes grow hot with tears.

But that won’t happen again with so many people around, right?

“Shindou the Scaredy-cat! Nyaa nyaa!”  
“Oh shut up!” Hikaru shouts back. He doesn’t know the other boys personally, but he does recognize them from the grade level below his. He storms into the bathroom to defy the accusation of cowardliness.

Fortunately, or as one should expect from a trip to the toilet, nothing unusual happens. Hikaru knows he’s more relieved than he should be. He finishes his business, washes his hands, and then steps back out into the hall.

“Huh?” Hikaru glances around when the sound of yelling reaches his ears. He wants to go have takoyaki, but it’s part of his duties to make sure the event runs smoothly. A strong feeling of responsibility prods him forward. If there’s trouble he has to either diffuse the situation or get a teacher to handle it.

“What are we going to do?” shouts a panicking student that Hikaru recognizes from the class across the hall from his. He knows the other boy, Mizaki he thinks, to be in the drama club. “With Saori-chan sick there’s no one to do her part!”  
“We’ll think of something, Mi-kun,” the tall girl with him says while waving her hands in an attempt to calm him down. Hikaru is pretty sure her name is Kunoji.  
“Like what? We don’t have an understudy! Not a lot of kids play the biwa you know!”

“I play.” The words leave Hikaru’s mouth before he can stop them. Two pairs of eyes lock on him and his bright green arm cuff like hungry beasts. He can’t take those words back.

In a whirlwind of movement he’s changed into a navy kimono, a black haori, a black eboshi hat, and then given a script with handwritten notes for scene music amidst the wailing of praises for his volunteering, and praying to any and all gods the drama students were hoping to invoke for luck.

It isn’t often that Hikaru is left speechless, but this is definitely one of those times. He is made to sit behind a silk screen, so the audience can only see his silhouette while the play progresses, with just a hearty good luck for comfort.

According to the title page, the play is called “Falling Short of the Moon.” It’s probably a tragedy with a title like that. Green eyes scan over the notes, which seem to be typical as far as Hikaru knows about these things: Cheerful, airy, sudden silence, terror. There are a few random thoughts peppered in as well for helping to set the mood.

Hikaru sighs. “I’m such an idiot.” He stares at the biwa, and in turn how he’s already holding it. ‘Do I really know how to play? It feels right.’ His fingers slide over the strings in a familiar caress. ‘I know how to play, right?’

A seed of confidence blossoms in his chest. He knows this instrument. He knows how to play it. He has practiced many long hours under a strict teacher.

“I can play.”

 

Akari kicks her feet as she nibbles on her share of takoyaki. She went ahead and got their snack, then found them a table to sit at, expecting Hikaru to join her in a few minutes. It’s been almost fifteen now, and she doubts the line to the boy’s room would be long enough to justify making her wait like this. “If he doesn’t get here soon I’m going to eat his portion.”

“Akari-chan!” Sayaka, a classmate who wears her hair in two long braids that drape well past her shoulders, runs up to her with another of the girls. “Have you heard?”  
“Heard what?” she asks in bewilderment. Sayaka is normally collected and calm, but she’s excited about something.

Kaera, the other girl, bounces on her toes, which makes her stylish short and curly hair bounce with her. “You won’t believe it, Akari-chan! Shindou-kun is in the play!”  
“Eh?” She can’t have heard her right.  
“It’s true,” Sayaka continues. “We overheard from some of the drama members when we went to ask if they needed help with setup.”  
“But Hikaru can’t act,” Akari protests. “What do they have him doing?”

“From what Amada-kun said,” Kaera begins with a disbelieving laugh, “he’s playing the biwa!”  
“Biwa?” Akari’s jaw drops. “When did he learn the biwa?”

 

Akari pays her 100 yen to get inside of the building where the play is being held on the stage. “There goes the pancake I was going to get,” she complains under her breath as she walks into the dark room. The play is already underway, around halfway through, because she got called to help a couple booths on her way over. While helping the last patron she learned that the drama club had put together an original story taking place during the Nara period and that it features live music. “I wonder what part Hikaru is really supposed to be playing? It can’t be the biwa. He could barely learn the recorder.” Her ears hurt at just the memory of Hikaru’s attempts.

She wiggles her way to a seat between a senior and someone’s mother while the head actress silently contemplates the falling Sakura to a slow melody like a meandering breeze on a cool spring morning. Akari glances around for a moment, skipping over the girls on stage to gaze at the boys but not a one of them looks like Hikaru. She wonders if he’s filling in backstage for someone and that she had misunderstood about him playing an active role. She can’t see the biwa player anywhere and begins to think it must be a tape.

There’s the sound of another person sitting behind her just before the music picks up its pace. The main character, Saya, takes to her feet, flinging her arms out to her sides as she begins to run around in delirium. Akari finds herself drawn deep into the story, the music urging her to feel the same gripping emotions Saya is experiencing as she breaks and sinks into spiritual madness. The audience is hushed except for halting breaths.

Hikaru feels almost possessed as he strikes the biwa strings. He had only glanced at the script as he read over the music notes left by the previous biwa player Saori, but as he listens to the story unfold something about the girl’s impending despair strikes a chord inside of him. It makes his eyes and chest hot, his fingertips tingle painfully. The improvised music surges out in crashing emotions, raging like a waterfall. He instinctively matches the high notes with Saya’s motions like he had received years of instruction with the instrument. The girl wails her anguish and collapses, his note howling with her as he pulls it long and thin.

Then it’s silent and the curtains fall.

Hikaru releases a shuddering breath that is lost in the sudden applause. “Fujiwara-sensei…” Hot tears mix with the sweat falling from his brow.

“Shindou-kun that was amazing! Here, drink this so you’re ready for the next act.” He takes the drink with an arm that feels numb without having lost its sensation. The girl is babbling about something but he doesn’t catch her words. The sounds of the crowd beyond the curtain and of the other students setting up the next scene only register on the edge of his senses. Hikaru feels possessed in every sense of the word.

The next act opens to the sorrowful notes of autumn floating across the stage. Hikaru doesn’t know or understand where the skill to play the instrument is coming from, certainly not his dream, but he vaguely recalls being told the spirits will allow someone to play well if the player has correct form.

‘Is a spirit in my body playing through me?’

The play swims by in a haze, the notes of the biwa ending with a cheerful, warm spring tone as Saya finds peace in a small temple. The crowd cheers and the actors and actresses start to line up to bow. The strength leaves Hikaru’s body, the plectrum drops from his hand and his shoulders slump. “What am I doing?” He doesn’t have time to contemplate further as the protective screen in front of him is yanked away. He’s pulled to his feet and made to bow while lights flash in his eyes, the sharp snaps and the clapping hands echoing between his ears. Hikaru dimly realizes that the fingers of his left hand are bleeding, the tips torn from pressing and sliding over the strings where he lacks calluses. ‘I hope I didn’t bleed on the biwa.’

Hikaru is herded behind stage with the rest, where a ruckus starts up when his injured hand is noticed. The school nurse is called and he’s made to wait in a folding chair. “I just need some band aids, it’s not that big of a deal,” he complains to himself even as the stings in his fingertips prick the nerves all the way up his arm. He feels sore all over like after a long soccer game, and his head feels heavy. Hikaru doesn’t say anything when the nurse finally comes and she lectures him about being more careful, while bandaging his wounds.

“Let your hand rest for the next couple days, the fingers are going to be tender for a while. I suggest you go home and take some pain medicine. If it worsens you should see your family doctor.”  
“Yes, madam.” He sighs after the busy woman finally leaves to see if anyone else is in need of her services. He stares at his wrapped appendage. “Was that really me?”

“Hikaru!” Akari jogs up to him.  
“Oh. Hey, Akari.” He stands up and hides his injured hand behind his back. It’s easy in the kimono and the mid-length haori that’s over it. “What are you doing back here?”  
“Me? What about you?” Her expression is confused and astonished. “When did you ever take biwa lessons? That was amazing!”  
Hikaru blushes and waves his hands in a dismissive gesture. “Nah, it wasn’t really all that. But if you liked it that much you can buy me some takoyaki in appreciation.”   
“Oh no! Your hand!” She grabs him by the wrist and inspects the bandages. “It’s like a mummy.”  
“Stop exaggerating,” he snaps as he yanks his arm back.  
“Is that from playing like you were? You shouldn’t be so reckless!”  
“Don’t you lecture me, too,” Hikaru whines.

“Shindou-kun!” Kunoji comes running up to him with a couple of the other drama students behind her. “That was better than fantastic!”  
“Our play really was better because of your music!” exclaims a girl Hikaru doesn’t know. “You’re levels above Saori-chan!”

“Don’t say that,” insists Kunoji. “Saori-chan was working very hard.”  
“No, she wasn’t,” cuts in Mizaki as he approaches the growing group. “She never showed up on time for practice, and she made ridiculous demands that slowed production and threw everyone off-balance. She knew we didn’t have an understudy for her. If Jou-kun hadn’t talked her out of those stupid script changes who knows what would have happened to the play.” Mizaki grins at Hikaru. “So thanks for showing up, Shindou-kun. I totally had the wrong idea about you from the rumor mill, but anyone who plays like you did can’t be all bad.”

Hikaru stares at Mizaki for a moment. The other boy is the same age but he appears more mature than the rest of them. He can feel some part of himself wanting to respond to that. His brow furrows. “Rumor mill?”

Akari squeaks and the drama students look embarrassed at having brought it up. “Hey, Akari, what the heck does the rumor mill say? You know I don’t listen to that stuff.”

Mizaki waves a hand in a dismissive gesture. “Nothing really bad,” he claims when it doesn’t look like the girl will answer. “Just the usual jock stuff, honest.” He scratches the same hand through his reddish hair. “Sorry, Shindou-kun, even as amateur actors we really should know not to judge a book by its cover.” He bows and the others soon follow his lead. “We’re sorry for misjudging you, and thank you again for helping us out of a pinch.”

Hikaru is dumbfounded at the display. He’s never had so many people bow to him like this before. It’s flattering and embarrassing at the same time. “Uh, no problem. I was glad to help. You don’t have to bow like that.”

He still wants to know what the rumors are, but he can let it pass for now. That part in the back of his head is telling him it would be bad form to push aside their gratitude.

The moment is broken when a new girl with black hair that flows down to her waist stomps up to them, harshly pushing a couple of the drama members aside. “You!” she screeches. “How dare you!”  
“Huh?”

“Saori-chan, you’re here!” Kunoji jumps between Saori and Hikaru. “Are you feeling better? We got the call that you were sick!”  
“I’m not talking to you,” spats Saori. “I’m talking to him!” She points a manicured finger at Hikaru’s nose.  
“Me?” To say Hikaru is baffled would be an understatement.

Akari scowls and steps in front of Saori with her hands on her hips, forcing the other girl to back away. “Hikaru-kun hasn’t done anything wrong, why are you so mad at him?” 

Saori’s mouth clamps shut and her face brightens to a brilliant red. She looks like she’s about to cry in frustration.

‘When prides covers for fear, only misery can result.’

The words bring a moment of clarity to Hikaru. The fingers of the girl’s left hand are wrapped in band aids. “Oh, I’m sorry.”  
“What?” Akari exclaims. “Hikaru, you don’t need to apologize to her!”

Hikaru steps around his friend and speaks to Saori directly. “You were scared, weren’t you? You must have been gathering the courage to go on when I interfered.” The girl bites her lips at his words. “You were scared that you wouldn’t be able to play to everyone’s expectations. That’s why you kept changing things.”

Kunoji reaches out to her. “Saori-chan, is that true?”

“Look at her hand,” Hikaru says while pointing with his bandaged one. “It’s all torn up from practicing.” There are gasps when the others finally notice. Kunoji gently picks her hand up.  
“These must really hurt.”

Saori shakes her head, tears now tumbling down her cheeks. “No! They don’t hurt enough,” she exclaims. “I should have done what he did and tore them while putting everything I had into playing on the stage, instead I was a coward and made everyone miserable!” She hugs the other girl. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!”

The drama club crowds around the pair, many saying that they accept the apologies and others are trying to cheer her up. Akari stays to the side, staring at the scene in front of her in amazement. She thought things like this only happened on television.

Mizaki is at the edge of the group, patiently waiting to speak to Saori personally. He obviously feels bad for misjudging her, too. Hikaru lightly bumps his arm with the knuckles of his bandaged hand. “Actors aren’t the only ones who act. Everyone would be better off if we learned to look a little deeper, don’t you think?” The blond banged boy grins then trots off, motioning for Akari to follow him. “Come on, we have more work to do.”

Behind him, Hikaru doesn’t see the impact his words have on his fellow student.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think we can all recognize the dialogue from the manga, lol. XD  
> By the way, totally [check out the cover art](http://dawneastpoint.tumblr.com/post/166583754979/title-day-dream-see-original-sketch-heian-style) I made for this series. :D

The tea had been infused with Chrysanthemum. The floral aroma was soft and sweet, permeating the entire room along with the gentle clacking of stones.  
Fujiwara-sensei moved with liquid grace as he placed his white pieces. He imagined that the waters of heaven had to be jealous of the beautiful man.

The board filled with the black and white stones, forming walls and trails that were enviably broken.

His companion faded away. The room grew cold, and the board was replaced with a scroll of the same game. The tea had a plum scent. An adult hand gently trailed fingertips over the old parchment, following the moves of White.

“How strange,” rumbled a deep voice. “I feel like I know this person.”

~

Hikaru knocks his alarm over in his attempt to shut it off. He groans his annoyance as the plastic mechanism plops to the floor and continues to sound, its incessant beeping like cicada rattling around his head. Green eyes finally blink open, mind still foggy with his dream.

He sits up and rubs his face with both hands, but he keeps seeing the stone-filled board and the yellowed scroll behind his closed lids. Those adult hands had been like his own. He can still feel the texture of the thick paper on his fingers. “Was that me, too…?”

The traces of the dream have faded away by the time he’s downstairs for breakfast. Mrs. Shindou places a bowl of miso in front of him, which he happily partakes of. “Your father has another business trip coming up.”

‘Big surprise.’ Hikaru waits for his bowl of rice before responding. “How long will he be gone this time?”  
“Three days, so not long. He’s going to Hokkaido, isn’t that exciting?” The boy shrugs, although his mother isn’t looking to see it.  
“I guess. He should bring back some souvenirs.”

Hikaru’s emotions are roiling around inside of him like bumper cars. He wants to be cheerful and excited to comfort his mother, but he’s not pleased that his father is leaving yet again, and with no indication that he plans to talk about their last incident.

The man had more or less decided to ignore everything that had happened at that dinner. He’s barely been home since then.

‘That man is a disgrace as a husband and as a head of household.’

Hikaru pauses in eating his rice. That thought had been strange. ‘What am I thinking?’

“How’s your hand? Do you need more pain medication?”  
“Nah, I’m good, mom. It doesn’t hurt anymore. I’ll be able to hold the stones no problem.” He wiggles his Band-Aid covered fingers to show that they work fine, then goes back to eating. The salt in the miso is somehow nostalgic.

‘Fujiwara-sensei, you liked it this way, didn’t you?’

He nearly chokes when he realizes the thought that casually crossed his mind. He hacks and his eyes water, his mother quickly patting his back.

“Hikaru are you alright? Did you swallow wrong?”  
“Y-yeah.” He scrubs his eyes of the tears with the back of a sleeve then wipes his miso-spattered mouth with a napkin. “Guess I’m still half-sleep.”

‘Where are these thoughts coming from?’ He hides his face against his sleeve again, trying to compose himself. ‘None of that’s real, they’re just dreams.’ After a moment he drops his arm, but before he starts eating again he gives in to the compulsion to correct his table setting. He mentally sighs to himself. ‘I doubt mom minds the better table manners, wherever I’m getting them from.’

He watches his mother from beneath his lashes. She looks haggard behind her serene smile. ‘I guess I won’t mind these dreams if it helps her even a little.’ His eyes stray to his father’s empty seat. ‘I should talk to him.’

~

A couple hours later finds Hikaru staring up at Kaio Middle School, tugging on the sleeves of the too big borrowed uniform jacket. “Another fine mess I’ve gotten into,” he mutters to himself as he walks into the expensive-looking institution.

His thoughts turn back to the school festival. To his surprise there had been a middle school student running a Go booth to promote the Haze Middle School’s Go club. The older boy, Tsutsui Kimihiro had been his name, had been handing out prizes after walking volunteers through basic life and death situations to give them an idea of the strategy the game cultivated. Out of nowhere another middle schooler, Kaga Tetsuo, showed up and completely disrespected the Go board by smothering his nasty cigarette on the smooth surface. At the same time he had been disparaging not only the game but calling Go players losers. What had really gotten Hikaru’s goat was when the boisterous redhead had boasted to be a better player than Akira.

“What’s the big deal about a lame guy who lost to me?”

There was no way he could let such a claim go unchallenged.

Hikaru sighs again as he makes his way into the unfamiliar school. He had gotten hotheaded and let the upperclassman egg him into making a comeback for Black in an unfinished game where an earlier player had made a huge mistake and given up. He didn’t know why he thought there was a chance, it had been an extremely bad mistake by whoever had been playing. Even worse, that jerk Kaga had torn apart the grand prize, a book by Touya Meijin, that he had had his eye on.

On top of that he lost by half a point.

“Now here I am because of that guy.” But Tsutsui-senpai, Kimihiro, had looked so excited at having enough people to enter this tournament. He would have felt like a heel to turn down the offer when the Kaga guy had suddenly declared they would enter as a team. Akari wasn’t going to let him live this down for a while, either. The only saving grace is that she won’t be here today.

Since he’s early neither Kaga or Tsutsui have arrived yet. He takes a look around since it’s supposed to be one of the best schools in the country, he’s curious what the differences are from his own school. The halls are wider and somehow cleaner. He thought his class did a pretty good job on clean-up duty but they must be using a better detergent here, or perhaps they have some other cleaning duty secret.

When he locates the tournament room there are already a lot of kids playing at the tables, and teachers are doing teaching games as well. It’s a nice environment. It reminds him of the Youth Go Tournament he had attended, then subsequently gotten thrown out of for his big mouth. His mood drops again when he realizes that can happen at this tourney too. “Nothing to it now except to move forward,” he mutters beneath his breath.

Hikaru locates the tournament brackets on the far wall to check the order of schools they’ll be facing, when a group of boys in the Kaio uniform catch his attention. ‘That kid lives in my neighborhood!’ He quickly turns his face away and hurries off to the opposite side of the room. Kaga would kick his ass if he got their team disqualified before the competition has even started, but how was he supposed to know any of the older kids come here? ‘He’ll definitely rat that I’m still in grade school and not a student at Haze Middle yet.’

He finds himself at a table set up for a practice game. Two boys from a school he doesn’t recognize are chatting about Kaio’s amazing strength as they begin to play, but after a few minutes the boy playing white bumps the board with his elbow and knocks half of the pieces out of position. Some even fall to the table.

“Oops! Sorry,” apologizes the white player. “My bad…” They start shuffling the pieces back onto the board.  
“ARGH! What are you doing?! That’s not how it was,” protests the black player.  
“Wait, that was there…”  
“No, that doesn’t go there.”

“Want me to put everything back?” Hikaru chirps. He reaches down without waiting for an answer and ignores their initial objections.  
“What’s the big idea?!” they both shout.  
“I saw the whole game,” the blond-bang boy explains as he begins placing down stones. “You went here, then he went there, and then this goes here, but then you went there…” Before long he has the entirety of the game replayed and in order. “And this was your last move, right?” He smiles at them, thinking it’s a job well done.

“So what, you show off,” snaps White. “I could’ve done that!” He waves an angry hand at Hikaru. “If that last stone had stayed where I put it, I would’ve won! Get out of my sight, kid!”  
“You were trying to cheat,” criticizes Black. White ignores him to continue berating towards Hikaru’s back.  
“Anybody who knows anything about Go can replay a whole game like that,” he asserts.

“Can you really do that?” Black asks after the small boy is gone. His friend doesn’t respond.

The young Shindou sighs to himself as he hides somewhere else. The older boy’s words are nagging at him. Perhaps seasoned Pros and regular playing amateurs can be expected to replay whole games from memory, but something tells Hikaru that students in general likely have trouble with such a feat, especially someone like himself who has only been playing for a few months now. ‘Has it been so short a time?’ he wonders. It feels like he has been playing longer. Much, much longer.

He’s relieved when the two Haze senpai show up. “Hey, Kimihiro,” he greets Tsutsui. He explains to them in hushed tones the complication of the neighbor kid. “So we have to lay low, okay?” Tsutsui looks worried, but he doesn’t have time to indulge in his fears before the starting announcement.

“The first round will now begin.”

Each school is given their table assignments, and Hikaru sits as the third seat. Kaga is the most experienced and probably the strongest player so he naturally takes the first seat. Tsutsui has taken the second seat for similar reasons. He doesn’t mind being in the weakest seat, he is the least experienced and he’s essentially only here to fill a chair. He’s not actually in the club and he has to keep a low profile now thanks to the unexpected neighbor.

‘I shouldn’t try too hard in the games. That will just attract attention.’

The contraption next to his spot catches his notice. Without thinking, he taps the button on top. KCHAK!

“What’re you doing?! The game hasn’t started yet,” berets his opponent sitting across from him. Tsutsui reaches over and hit another button.  
“Hikaru, the game clock starts when you push that button,” he explains as he resets it. “Each player gets 45 minutes. You press this button after every move, understand?”  
“Oh, okay. I’ve never seen one before.”  
“Hey, I thought you were gonna keep a low profile,” Kaga snarks. Hikaru rolls his eyes.  
“I said sorry. I’ve never played in a tournament.”

He’s feeling less and less motivated to play right now. He was starting to get excited from seeing so many people playing, but he’s like a fish out of water here. The other participants have been preparing themselves for this, and Hikaru is winging it in comparison. He feels like a fake.

“Please begin,” orders the announcer.

The sounds of go-ke and stones being shuffled fills the large room. Hikaru doesn’t pay it much mind until the opponent first seat speaks, his tone mocking. “You’re the first? Aren’t you in the Shogi club? What’re you doing here? Didn’t your school’s Go club have enough players? Couldn’t even scrounge up three?”  
“Yeah, whatever,” Kaga responds, a hand fan in one long-fingered grip. “Let’s just choose for color.”  
“Choose for color?” questions the other first seat. “Wouldn’t you rather play Shogi?” His teammates snicker and laugh.  
“You’re lucky we’re playing Go.” Kaga snaps the fan closed and pokes it against the other teen’s forehead. “If this were Shogi, your king would be dead in five minutes! But since this is Go, the game will last ten minutes! You get to play for five more minutes.”

He other male half-snarls and pulls away, protecting his forehead with one hand now. “How can you say that?” he demands. “You don’t even know how strong of a player I am.”  
“I could tell how strong you were right away.” The redhead picks his nose with his free hand. “Those that have to mouth off right from the start are usually pretty weak.”

His opponent’s response is cut off by one of the officials. “You over there! Start your game!”

Hikaru is assigned the white stones for his game. He prefers black, but it’s good practice to be white sometimes. “Onegaishimasu.” Unfortunately, his attention is pulled away again when Kaga yells at Tsutsui for keeping a book of techniques on hand. He groans and bows his head to keep his face hidden. Who knew that keeping a low profile could be so difficult in what should be a quiet game?

“You forgot to hit the clock,” points out the boy from across from him.  
“Huh? Oh, oops! Thanks!” He hits the button quickly.  
“I’m such a good sport,” the older male brags while his friends laugh again.

His goal isn’t to win as they play, but he doesn’t feel like having a big loss either. He settles on doing a subtle teaching game. He may not be able to tell him off, but he can still teach him a lesson so to speak.

It’s not a good game. It’s childish, but Hikaru is maximizing on annoying play, whether he wins or loses doesn’t matter. It’ll be close either way, but he’ll win in that his opponent will be left unsatisfied. He’s twelve, he can be excused this much, right?

“I can’t hear you,” Kaga says boldly.  
“I… I resign,” the opponent first seat stutters out. The expressions of surprise on both of his teammates and their Go advisor are priceless.  
“Okay, that was ten minutes.” The chair screeches a bit as he stands from it.

“Don’t lose your focus. It’s okay,” assures the teacher. “It’s the best of three. You two can do it. It was unfortunate that Moriyama’s opponent was so strong. He was on a different level.”

Hikaru returns to the game when his opponent does. He smiles just to rankle the older boy.

“What the hell kind of gameplay is this?” Kaga groans in disbelief, now standing behind Hikaru. The redhead can’t decide if it’s bad play or just weird. It’s an interesting style but the play is immature and even silly. It’s in sharp contrast to what he had witnessed at the school festival.  
“I call it Cat and Mountain Rabbit,” Hikaru answers after a second, placing a white stone down with his left hand. He grins up at the teenager, green eyes bright. “It’s to stretch the time.”

Kaga barks a laugh. It still isn’t good play, but now he understands the moves the grade schooler has been making. “Alright, but stop sucking. You can’t be this bad.”

Hikaru’s opponent isn’t nearly so amused. “Are we done? It’s clear that I’ve won and I’m getting tired.”  
“I resign. Thank you for the game.”  
“Whatever,” the teen mutters. Looks like Hikaru won the round after all.

A couple minutes later and it’s announced that Tsutsui has won his game 60 ½ points to 61. “I lost? He made a comeback?” The second seat opponent is completely shocked. “I was ahead through the middle game…”  
“He caught up by 20 points in the endgame,” the advisor points out.

“The endgame was always your strong point,” Kaga comments.  
“Uh-huh,” Tsutsui agrees. “I’m good at counting points and the endgame.”  
“I guess it evens out with your ridiculous opening game,” criticizes the redhead on the opening moves of his fellow middle schooler. Hikaru laughs.  
“But you both won, so it’s great!” He takes a bop on the nose from Kaga’s fan. “Ouch!”  
“You resigned,” the redhead senpai scolds.

The next game’s opponent is a familiar face. From Sawada Middle School, it’s the boy who had tried to cheat in his practice game. Having already witnessed his play, Hikaru doesn’t feel worried. While the teenager lacks basic ethics, he can’t feel serious about the game. Instead he plays on automatic with his left hand as he turns his attention inward, examining the strange dream he had last night.

‘I was two people in that one. The first one was the usual kid but older, and the second person… was a grown man? An Adult? I felt old.’ He stares at his right hand, flexing it as he waits for his opponent to make his next move. ‘It’s like I’m missing something. And I swear the second one thought he somehow knew the first one? But that scroll was older than he was, so that isn’t possible. I don’t get it.’

Kaga, already finished with his game again, comes up behind Hikaru once more. The redhead scowls. “Hey, are you being serious about this? This play is crap! You’ve got to be better than this, are you just playing around?”  
“Uh-huh, just playing around,” the boy admits.  
“What?!”

Hikaru grins and points to the board, ignoring his disgruntle opponent. “I mean look… the Go board has nine star points on it, right? It’s just like space.” He holds up a black stone pinched between the fingers of his left hand. “And you place stones down one after the other, kind of like adding stars in space. It’s like creating the universe.” He clacks it down onto the board, it’s neither a good or bad move. “Just like a God. I become just like a God, high above the board.”

The Haze student is speechless. He hadn’t been expecting anything that deep and profound.

A sharp clack breaks the silence. Hikaru’s eyes dart back to the board, the white stone seeming to glow under the florescent lights. ‘That’s an interesting move.’ His gaze flickers to the other boy's face; he’s frowning. ‘Are you angry with me?’ Hikaru feels his mouth pull into another grin, then he reaches into the go-ke with his dominant hand. His arm feels heavier, his fingers longer and callused, as he lifts his next stone with a grace that takes years to hone. It doesn’t feel like his arm at all, like someone else is guiding him.

‘But what will you do when I answer like this?’ rumbles an amused older voice as he snaps the black piece down.

His opponent jerks in surprise, but responds quickly. Heat blossoms in Hikaru's chest, and he snaps down another stone. 

Their exchange is quick like the clashing of swords. Then it’s over.  
A decisive blow splits white’s territory and ruins its shape.

The other boy gawks in disbelief before bowing his head. “I resign.”  
“That was a good exchange,” Hikaru commented. “Thanks for the game.”

“You barely won, but that’s two wins and one loss again,” Kaga says. Both of them look to the empty second seat—Tsutsui had left when he lost to the stronger player.

The redhead stares at the Go board, then at Hikaru, and back to the board. The last half of the game is more like what he had been expecting. He roughly hooks an arm around Hikaru’s neck and pulls the smaller boy in close. “Hey,” he whispers, “we’ve been keeping something from you. If we don’t win this tournament, they’re going to take away the Go club.”  
“What?!” Hikaru jumps to his feet, dislodging his senpai’s arm. “I thought all I had to do was show up.”  
“Tsutsui didn’t want to tell you, cause he didn’t want you to feel the pressure,” the redhead explains further. “And that’s not all! Since I’m the ace of the Shogi club, the guys weren’t too happy about lending me to the Go club. They were saying if we can’t even win the tournament, they’re going to take it out on Tsutsui. And they’re really tough, I don’t know what they’ll do to him.”  
“But all Kimihiro wants to do is save his Go club,” Hikaru argues. He can’t believe that Kaga’s club members could so upset over a small event like this.  
“That’s why you’ve got to play with all you’ve got!” He grabs the other boy’s shoulders with both hands and pins him with his sharp gaze. “No more of this cat and rabbit shit! Show us what you can really do in the next game!”

Hikaru stares at his hands in frustration. ‘I didn’t know Kimihiro was playing with so much pressure on his shoulders. No wonder he left after a lost. He must have needed to calm down, I hope Kaga-senpai telling him we’re moving to the next round cheers him up.’

He swallows and licks his lips.

When they sit down for the finale against Kaio Middle School, Hikaru swears that he can smell Sakura and that there’s a comforting presence wrapping around him. He’s also relieved to see Tsutsui rearing to go. Whatever Kaga said to him, it obviously worked. The passive teen even puts down his joseki book.

“The final match—Kaio against Haze. Please begin your games.”

Hikaru reaches into his go-ke with his right hand and lifts out his first white stone. He doesn’t want to crush the other boy, he doesn’t want to re-experience the horrible feelings from when he beat Akira the second time, but he has to win.

His limbs feel heavy again.

The opening game goes quickly, each of them making their preferred starting placements. In his ear he hears whispering—the same voice that makes him shiver in his dreams, it’s Fujiwara-sensei.

He plays the hane at point 10-5, then he extends at 3-9 in response to Black. Another extension at 14-17 followed by attaching with 4-17. Slowly the rivers of white and black begin to take form. ‘Listen carefully, …-kun, do not just play the moves like a puppet. Try to feel the flow of each and every stone. Pay close attention to the flow of my moves.’

The lines of stones glow in his eyes.  
The flow of the moves.

‘Pay close attention to the flow of my moves. This, you should be able to do, …-kun.’

There’s a closed box inside of his heart, deep inside of his soul. Hikaru feels a crack, then the lid flips open. Heat flows from his chest and extends to every part of his body, filling his fingers and toes, making the top of his head tingle.

Something clicks into place. It’s like he found something he had lost, he hadn’t known how empty he was until just now.

It’s like he has awakened from a long sleep.

The world he had been living in had been monochrome and fuzzy like a picture out of focus. Now everything is sharp and clear, there’s depth he had been unaware of.  
The yin and yang rivers are so bright.

The stones leave his fingers as if of their own wills. They know where they want to be. Black is cut off, liberties are shorted, and territory is fought over.  
Before he knows it, they’re in the endgame, then it’s over.

Hikaru has won against the third seat of elite Kaio Middle School Go club.

His focus is finally pulled away from the board when the Kaio Go advisor rests a hand on his opponent’s shoulder in a comforting manner. “You played well.” The teen has tears slipping down his cheeks, which he wipes away with a sleeve. “Thank you, Yun-sensei.”  
“And thank you,” Hikaru says. “It was your strength that allowed us to play this game.” He bows his head. “Thank you, let’s play again.”

More tears fall, but the Kaio player looks at peace as he bows back. “Yes, let’s play again.”

“With two wins and one loss, this means Haze wins the tournament,” informs the tournament head. Sounds of shock and incredulity runs through the crowd at Kaio’s unexpected defeat.

“Hey, isn’t that the Shindou’s kid? It is, it’s Hikaru!”

Hikaru is still running on his adrenaline high. At first he doesn’t react to his name, it sounds oddly foreign, like it belongs to someone else. Then Kaga curses and Hikaru remembers who he is. “Uh oh.”

The neighbor kid is pointing right at him. “You’re in the sixth grade! What’re you doing here?” The crowd erupts in a new uproar with his grade school status being revealed. Haze is disqualified, keeping Kaio as the reigning champion.

“Does that mean no more Go club?” Hikaru asks in a small voice. In the corner of his vision, someone approaches him. His eyes widen. “Akira? I mean Touya-san.” The green-haired boy is dressed in a shorts suit like he just had an interview.  
“That was a beautiful game,” the young Touya compliments.  
“That’s right,” Kaga agrees while giving Hikaru a searching gaze.  
“I only wish that it was I that had been your opponent,” Akira admits. His dark green eyes are intense and full of passion. They’re similar to Fujiwara-sensei’s eyes, clear and beautiful and full of earnestness.

Kaga pats Hikaru’s shoulder as he turns around. “Well, I want to hurry and get back to playing Shogi. And listen,” a huge grin overtakes his face as he continues, “all that stuff about them taking away the club if we didn’t win… I was lying.”  
“What?!” That means he was stressing out over that for nothing.

“Hikaru.” He turns his attention back to the Go prodigy, relieved that the other boy is okay with given names. He hadn’t wanted to offend him. “I understand that I have to overcome you before I will be able to play the Divine Move. That’s why I’m not going to run away from you anymore.”  
“Akira…” He feels his cheeks heat up. “I… I don’t think it’s me you want to overcome, I’m still searching for it too.” He gazes into Akira’s serious eyes. ‘His eyes are so intense, just like Fujiwara-sensei,’ comes the thought unbidden. “But maybe we can find it playing together.”

This time Akira’s cheeks turn red. “I’m holding you to that.”

Akira has to take his leave, it seems he’s in the middle of touring the institution. Hikaru glances back to the game he had played, it’s been left on the board for others to study for the meantime. A winning game, but disqualified because he personally wasn’t eligible for the tournament. It’s a shame, but it’s a game that won’t be forgotten. He can remember every move.

He can feel Fujiwara-sensei standing behind his left shoulder with his signature fan covering the lower half of his face. ‘Did you sense anything from our game, …-kun?’

Hikaru breathes in the scent of Sakura and plum. A smile pulls on his lips. “Yes.”

**Author's Note:**

> [Want to stay updated on my art and stories?](http://dawneastpoint.deviantart.com/journal/Check-Here-for-my-Updates-638603365)  
>  It'll be two steps because I'm not allowed to mention my personal blog on here.


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